No Stupid Questions

Kind of. I've amassed a fair amount of knowledge over the span of this life I'm over halfway through, but very little in the way of accomplishments. (Not counting the achievements in video games.)

I grew up evangelical, and I definitely wasted my young years not living life because of it.

Yea but I go easier on myself these days as I see it now as part of a larger systemic problem. Living in suburbs, having social anxiety, struggling with toxic family issues, etc. It all played a part in my escapism into video games and unproductive time sinks. I forgive myself for the past and try to do better today. It's about making the most of the opportunities that are given to you, cheesy as it sounds.

Only compare yourself to yourself if you’re doing better than you were a month ago, year or even decade you’re going the right way. Everyone has skeletons in their closet to you rarely get to see medical issues, spouse cheating, debt up to their eyeballs all this can be hidden for a long time.

Comparison is the thief of joy

For every 1 dude who does incredible shit, 99 of us are getting by being content. Being content and unremarkable is the norm, don't let social media or fucked up parents tell you otherwise.

The only meaning to life is being happy and content. There really isn't any meaning to it, so the former is the best option.

If you really feel like you need to do something or regret it forever, then you need to get off your ass and start making changes. Otherwise surprise! You're just like everyone else!

Nobody TRULY cares except YOU and MAYBE your closest loved ones. Even then you realize people pay way more attention about what people think they think about them vs what they actually do. Most people generally don't give two shits as long as you treat them with GENUINE love, openness, bare minimum respect.

Eh I wasted a lot of time in my 20s could've been more aggressive about a career/family compared to other people... but I'm not other people. Think I needed that time to figure my own head out

Starting my life from scratch in late twenties again. Learned 99% about life in the past couple of solitary nothing-to-do years, or I'll just say, my thinking/ doing has changed completely. Now, I'm having a hard time relating to things other people relate to. Spending a lot of time alone surely is life changing. When you start to believe in nothing, you have a hard time dealing with people.

This idea that we have to be "productive" with our time is perhaps the biggest source of human suffering, not just for ones who feel guilty for not being productive, but also the overly ambitious psychos who force their "greatness" on everyone else (just think of tyrants who want to rule over others to make a name for themselves).

seeing them irl or seeing their insta feed? that social media trash is curated.

I personally haven't ever been that concerned with what others are/aren't accomplishing. ymmv

Huge thread, wow.

I know that by thirty years old you know something of what you are aiming at so bear in mind that at that point if you're not doing what you're supposed to be doing you'll feel it. Nothing wrong with that.

What's the point of people inventing all this cool stuff if nobody else sits down to enjoy the improvements though? Think of all the people who are actively RUINING the world right now. As long as you're not one of them, its all good.

My one friend, Rob Antecki, was a scientist and musician on the verge of working towards a treatment to prolong the human life-span, maybe even eventually ending the aging process. He worked his life whole towards that goal! Then one day in his late 40's, he was coming home from the fundraiser for his new biotech startup and whammo, hit another car, died on the spot. He never achieved his goal of ending aging or got his music app company going. His business partners will be lucky if they can even salvage his work because its so high level few people on the planet can understand it.

There's like 10 billion people in the world. If you try to measure yourself against everyone else, well, that's your choice, but there's always a bigger fish. There's also some people who begin the race farther ahead with more money, more connections, family of legacy, etc. Success is not the measure of a soul's worth or a life's pursuit. To better oneself though, it is a noble goal. That is not connected to changing the world, only changing yourself.

I was lucky in this regard, to have someone who has the drive to create and do things as my roommate. And also another roommate, who was the exact opposite - your standard "go to work, and then watch netflix all the time". First of all, seeing the contrast between those two was eye opening.

And second, the drive is infectious. I usually don't manage to find the motivation to do things on my own, and tend to procrastrinate. But having someone who has the drive, and just joining his projects, will get you the motivation. The best advice for life I can give to anyone is to surround themselves with people who have hobbies you want to have, to join communities and offer help as a volunteer with running it (this is important - don't just join as a lurker, but as a volunteer). Sure, you may not be good at it - but you're no longer doing it for yourself, which will usually end with me giving it up - but the community depends on you. And that's something that helped me tremendously with learning new things, or just getting out and doing something.

Thanks to that, we have a indie studio that is working on a game in our free time. I'm also helping with organizing and DJing at events for our smaller music subculture, because I just offered my help to volunteer and help with it, which has also prompted me to start learning how to do stage lighting, so I can make the parties better - which was a hobby I wanted to do, but never found the motivation. I was volunteering at gamedev conferences, where I've met amazing people that eventually landed me a job, while also not having to pay the ticket for the conference. I have joined a group that organizes LARPs, and even though I had basically nothing to offer aside from a pair of hands and my time, just being in the group chat was inspiring - and it's only a matter of time before someone asks "Hey, we need someone to do projection mapping, can anyone do that?", and you'll be like "Never done that, but I can try". And now you're not just doing it for yourself, so you will get better motivation to do that.

So, if you don't have the drive or motivation to do stuff on your own - find someone to do it with, who has the drive, and help him. It is infectious. Everything I now do in my free time, be it stage ligthning, DJing or projection, I had no experience with when I offered my help to the group of organizers that were doing it. Sure, at first the only thing I did was carry stuff from place A to place B, but just being around those people, in their groupchat and part of the planning they do for events, eventually led to the "I've never done that, but I can try learning it". And if it doesn't work? Well, in cases like that I was the only one willing to try, so the alternative would be to not have the thing in the first place, and if I said "Hey, I tried, it's not gonna work", then nothing was lost.

Also - watch this video. While it's not exactly about finding motivation, it shows that it's ok to not be the guy coming up with ideas, but the world needs more people who are willing to help the people with drive and motivation and embrace their thing.