this post was submitted on 17 Feb 2025
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I'm finding very little of this thread resonates with me. I have a toddler who I love and get to spend a whole day off with during the week. I still get to do my running, cycling, rock climbing. I get some reading done most nights.
I've mostly sacrificed video games and social life, but rock climbing is social and a happy child is far more rewarding than games.
There are sacrifices, but I don't feel like I've given up my life. Is this because I don't live in the USA?
Yeah, I think one has to think about carefully first before having kids, and be prepared what they have to sacrifice. Raising a child is not easy.
I think what this post is portraying is regret that they haven't expected on what sacrifices they have to make to take care of a child. A lot of people want to get married and/or have kids just for the sake of it, because that is what society expect them to do.
Another big part is that so many people have virtually zero support. It's just them and their kids. For the first few years, we lived a 4.5hr drive from any family support. I don't even know how you find and vet babysitters these days.
It doesn't help that we're atheists, so we don't even get the built in community support that a lot of churches provide.
I'm in a similar position. Secular childcare is insanely expensive and the only alternative is church preschool. For what its worth, I don't worry about the more liberal religious schools as kids believe in Santa at that age anyways.