this post was submitted on 22 Mar 2025
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*Ketamine-high Musk just finishing beating to death one of his online critics, with blood dripping from his baseball bat in front of the cameras
Trump: Eh, you gotta forgive Elon, the poor guy is going through a rough patch with all that illegal Tesla boycotting. That guy had it coming. Anyone would have done the same in Elon's place, give him a break.
*A bystander proceeds to try and get Musk, gets tackled by security
Trump: You criminal monster, how dare you even look sideways at poor Elon! Death penalty and public execution!