this post was submitted on 08 Jul 2025
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Relationship Advice

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Hey all, hope everyone is doing well.

I’m curious if anyone out there has made a conscious decision to not date or be in a relationship anymore.

If so, what was your rationale? Do you feel it was the right decision? If you’re currently considering it, why?

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 days ago (1 children)

I did in my mid 20s because my track record with relationships was pretty crummy and a big part of that was who I was choosing. After a couple years ended up deciding to date a friend of a friend, screwed that up, dated one other person and then quit that, got back together with the friend of a friend and we have been married for 20 years.

The biggest lesson was that the times that women really found me interesting was when I was either in a relationship and not available or when I wasn't making myself available intentionally. Still had to go out and socialize to meet people of course, but not trying was more successful than trying because I wasn't stressing about whether things would work out and was just being myself.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 days ago

True, the people you choose are always going to have an impact on the relationship itself. I’ve had similar experiences, regarding partners. They just weren’t a good fit ultimately.

As commented elsewhere, I do think in our 20s it’s difficult to really pin down the perfect partner. Not that it can’t be done but it’s probably not as common as Hallmark movies would make you think 🙂

I think it’s awesome you did find the right person and were able to turn it into a solid relationship!!

Lucky for me women never find me interesting, which makes it easier to not socialize… because… you know… people and interactions and all that 😂

I appreciate your story and perspective on this, thank you so much!