this post was submitted on 29 May 2025
686 points (100.0% liked)

Programmer Humor

24143 readers
2014 users here now

Welcome to Programmer Humor!

This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!

For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.

Rules

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 98 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (6 children)

Nope, JS is “You think you are nerd”.

Also, why React is there? It’s a lib not a language

[–] [email protected] 84 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

This guy right here is a certified nerd

[–] [email protected] 41 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

This guy right here is a certified nerd certifier

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago

definitely a nerd's nerd.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (4 replies)
[–] [email protected] 51 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Ah, yes. My favourite programming language (checks notes) HTML...

If your favourite programming language is HTML, we do not grant you the title of Nerd.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)
[–] [email protected] 43 points 2 weeks ago

A real nerd would know that React is a library and HTML is a markup language, and neither are programming languages.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

matlab is nobody's favourite language. although using it does require an engineering degree, which makes you a nerd.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago (6 children)

Or a physics student who wants to cry. cue thousand yard stare to freshman year in college.

load more comments (6 replies)
[–] [email protected] 27 points 2 weeks ago (7 children)

Most of these are scripting languages. Some are even markup languages. It's like the meme creator didn't even know what a programming language was.
I hope someone got fired for that blunder

[–] [email protected] 32 points 2 weeks ago

What your comment says about you:

You are a nerd

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

What's the difference between a scripting language and a programming language?

[–] [email protected] 26 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Some people think that only compiled languages are true programming languages. (Needless to say, they're wrong.)

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Needless to say, they're wrong.

Not least because there's no such thing as a "compiled" or "interpreted" language.

Which is to say that it's a property of the tooling rather than the language itself. There's nothing stopping anyone from writing a C interpreter or a Python compiler.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 weeks ago

There's nothing stopping anyone from writing a C interpreter

Except god, hopefully

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago

Yeah, once you know all the details, the distinction disappears. The term doesn't clarify understanding.

If I had to make a distinction, it'd be that scripting languages are meant to be a simple way to serve a specific niche. Things like SQL or Excel formulas. It doesn't apply to Python.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (4 children)

Do you know what community you're in? Do you want to start a war?


There is no clear definition because there is a lot of overlap, especially when you get into the details, but:

  • Scripting languages are often considered to be very high level and can commonly run without compilation. Making them great to automate tasks or create a simplified interaction/abstraction layer to a more complex program.

  • Programming languages usually have much lower level access, and by extension they tend to be more complicated. In exchange for that, you get much more control. Although the access varies from Assembly to languages a C programmer would consider "scripting".

Although for every example, there is basically a counter example. Because programmers being who they are, see it as a challenge to do something with a language that others consider impossible or wrong.

For example, there are things like NodeOS, a "Lightweight operating system using Node.js as userspace."

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago

For example, there are things like NodeOS, a "Lightweight operating system using Node.js as userspace."

No way this exists.

Wtf, it exists. Why would anyone do that to the world?

load more comments (3 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 weeks ago

A scripting language is a type of programming language...

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] [email protected] 24 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

I think simply knowing what the "F" is means you're old and a nerd.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

It's still commonly used in STEM fields.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago

I have to take a breath whenever I find an F77 file. Prepare for a lack of objects!

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 21 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (5 children)

I am old and a nerd and I don’t see Perl on here.

Wait… is it the tiny camel at the bottom?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

Yep. It has no logo of its own, so it sometimes gets identified by the animal on the O'Reilly book

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

No Haskell so I'm not a nerd 😎. Though from the languages I use the most (Java & Python) and other languages I enjoy (Rust, Julia) I can infer that I'm probably a bit of a nerd.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I believe Haskell makes you the pope of nerds.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 weeks ago

I didn't knew that (1) Fortran has such logo and (2) I am old. Shit

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

if you have a favorite language that isn't on this, you're a super nerd.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 weeks ago

F in the chat for Fortran programmers.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

No QBASIC, can not confirm.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Bottom right should be "You're a nerd and getting old".

Source: I was dicking around with mod_perl yesterday.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

As an engineer this is extremely offensive. MATLAB is for fucking tryhards.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

Matlab sucks ass no real engineers use it, only college kids.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (4 children)

I've had more than one job where Matlab was used extensively, guess my coworkers and I aren't real engineers.

I'd rather use something else, but if it's what the group already uses, fine, I'll do it

Also, I don't do a ton of true programming on it. It's a fancy calculator, and occasionally I make a GUI app with it

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

So many come out of school with Matlab experience. I get them started with python. They brush me off. Then the license server goes down. Welcome to open source grasshopper! I should make a meme about this and put on my door...

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Thankfully I suck at that, but holy crap it is prevelent in this industry. The alcohol abuse is cray. Doesn't help when you travel constantly. I don't travel much anymore, but the people who spend 90+% of the year in the field, while having a family, are fundamentally broken. Fun to party once in a while, but when they do this shit multiple times a week, I don't understand.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago

Couldn't agree more. Field service is one hell of a drug. Money's good, variety is fun, the chaos and travel are fun too, and you learn a lot quickly. The latter often because some or all of the mfg. plant you're visiting needs you to fix your stuff so they can run, and no one is coming to BFE to help you, lol.

But that all wears off, in time, and it starts to take a huge toll like you described. Never met a long term field service engineer with a healthy home life, or with their health in general. I got out because both of mine were crumbling, for real.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago

We can just remove the HTML5 entry all together.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Fixed! "Fotran: You are ~~old~~ dead and a nerd"

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago

Right hand to baby Jesus, I thought Kmart was basically no longer in operation, when did it become a programming language for nerds?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

I am in fact an engineer and a nerd. Or as many of us like to call it, an enginerd

Edit: I wouldn't call Matlab my favorite though... But yes I use it. I mean, I'm on Lemmy... Like loads of users here, I like FOSS. So I'd say python is probably my favorite

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago

Happy to see Julia on the list.

Apparently I am a nerd. I accept that.

load more comments
view more: next ›