Edwardrotik

Generally, convincing a partner to open a relationship is a bad idea. It's better to frame it as something you'd like to try, and let them gradually warm to the idea through conversation.

But since he's bringing it up, you can modify that. Be honest. Tell him that it's a turn on. Discuss the boundaries, expectations and benefits. Let it build to a mutual desire, and it'll happen naturally.

It's usually a good idea to be very picky about who is and isn't an acceptable play partner. Strangers vs friends are a totally different vibe. Men vs women. Emotional bonding okay or not. All the little things that can make the experience go good or bad.

Back in the era of my non monogamous life, if I was sharing with other men, it had to be a situation of mutual respect. No exceptions, no mistakes on that allowed or I was out and that meant out if the boundary wasn't enforced by my partner as well. So it was almost always going to happen with friends, or in established groups for the purpose.

With women, I still insisted on that respect, it was just less likely to go wrong since even unfamiliar women willing to play were also usually all about agreements being done before play. Only ever had to call that rule into things once. Then again, even with men because it was always a mutually agreed process, it never had to go beyond a "hey man, remember we're all here to have fun, it isn't a competition" and it would be fine, no need to end the play.

Really, most guys that are bringing it up, all you gotta do is be patient and be willing to insist everything is hashed out before there's other dick in you. Which is just as true if you're all guys, as far as I ever saw, and it holds true if there's no second dick involved at all.

I've been the second guy as well. So I'd say make sure that whoever you might pick is aware of your boundaries and asks questions that show they understand what is involved, rather than them chasing tail and not caring about anything else. It's a hell of a lot nicer if you're the outsider if your new partners are clear about big issues. Like, if the couple want a bit of role play where you're playing bull, you need to know that. And the reverse is even more important; if there's something like they don't want you complimenting or encouraging either of them, you want to know that. It can be awkward as hell to express admiration of someone's cunnilingus skills and they realize that they don't want your input like that.

Remember, all the work it takes/took you and your guy to become happy partners has to be done for the third person, and it has to be right for both of you and for him/her. It's not just you having sex with the third party, even if your bf isn't in the room. There's still three interactions in play. If you're all in the room, every little dynamic might matter.

Also, since your question came with a pic, I don't think you'll have trouble finding someone, so you can afford to be picky.

I'm all for it.

It's easy enough to filter out if a specific user gets spammy, and I got very used to seeing men naked in erotic settings a long time ago. It doesn't turn me on, but it's still nice to know that guys can share themselves and feel good.

I do have a bit of snobbery about the quality of the pictures themselves, but does that matter? I don't vote based on it, and don't even comment often enough to spend that time complaining about someone else's pics.

But you did ask for input about types of pics. Me, from the standpoint of appreciating good erotic photography, I prefer shots taken with some care and planning. Random dick picks are boring. As are those where someone is throttling their dong. We've all seen that, it ceases to be visually compelling.

A good shot that includes the rest of the body to some degree, in decent lighting, and in natural poses are top tier. A penis isn't necessary for a picture to be erotic, the same as full frontal isn't necessary for photos of women to be. So, when in doubt, diversify. Give us the line of your hip, or the way lats curve. Something showing the beauty of the male form.

Nothing wrong with the way she's built

I mean, take a look and then keep walking

Wtf else is anyone going to do?

That's the frenulum

The frenulum is a fren to you, yum.

Sure! Both actually.

While I'm not into men, I am into dominance, and can enjoy some things with men in that context, so I've done most things you can do with other men.

Can't say giving a hummer worked well. The extra concentration needed took me out or the right headspace to ignore that I was with a man, so I couldn't focus on what I was doing, if that makes sense.

I've gotten quite a few though. I can't say they're better than head without the vibration, but they are definitely different in a pleasant way.

You seem to be a very wonderful person to be around, even without the sex involved.

Sure, it feels fine. The whole idea that a pussy gets too relaxed to be felt is not going to apply to anyone with a normally functioning penis. There are issues that reduce sensitivity enough that a fully relaxed vagina might not provide enough stimulation to reach orgasm. And may not be felt to a significant degree through a condom when you have those issues.

But that's what it is, relaxed muscles. You can get pounded for hours, and as long as you're in decent health, and have done kegals, you should still be able to engage those muscles and grip just fine.

As a fantasy thing though, it is absolutely possible for at least a few guys in the train to have trouble touching the walls of your exhausted and abused cunt. Even a horse cock might not do more than tickle the sides once you've been fucked into a hypnotic state. If those muscles are just too worn out to flex, it's not going to feel like much compared to when they all got started.

But, give you a few minutes, a bottle of water, and a slap on the ass, and you'll be able to grip again.

Sure, and it's easy to tell the difference usually. Mouth, pussy, ass, they're just built different.

Now, an ass that's been well used, if you're wearing a condom, could probably be harder to tell from a warmed up pussy.

And yes, you can usually tell if a pussy has already been well fucked. The muscles tend to relax after the first few. If anyone ahead of you was allowed to come inside, it's definitely more slippery. You might not notice as much if you're wearing a condom, but if you pay attention you can tell the difference between semen and pussy juice even through a condom.

I rarely shared a woman with other men where I was willing to not use a condom, but you can absolutely tell the difference then, without question. I've been the first one in, and gone later in the train, and it is unmistakable, even without anyone coming inside.

With enough men, it may not be pleasant though. A lot of women will stop being able to lubricate on their own, and if they don't want artificial lube, it can get into the kind of pain that isn't fun trying to go at it the way is usually wanted in a situation like that. Most women I encountered that wanted a gang bang wanted it to be hard, forceful. A dry pussy hurts a bit to get into and can hurt a lot to fuck. Trying to fuck hard, and even with a love of pain, it can be too much.

So, if you're prone to running out of your own juices, plan ahead if you're taking more than two or three in a row. Have lube handy, or be prepared to be raw by the end of things.

I don't know that I've ever been truly torn over a fantasy. Anything I felt would be fun, I did.

It didn't all work out, of course. Most of it did, but not at every occurrence.

Take a gang bang for example. I thought it might be fun, and when a lady in one of the groups I was in wanted to have one, I signed up.

It turns out that a lot of what happens at a gang bang is waiting around watching other men masturbate. Once you have more than four or five people, you can't all have a good view of the action without extra effort and planning. It was still fun, but not as exciting as I had thought it would be. Still joined in a few later on, with varying degrees of enjoyment, but it all fell short of the fantasy.

However, performing in front of a crowd was better than the fantasy. It is unique, even if you're used to orgies and group scenes. Being on a stage, even a small one in someone's play room, being watched and applauded, it is a rush. If the crowd is bigger, there's a tipping point where it feels more anonymous, even if you know everyone. You're up there, they're watching, and waves of arousal move through the audience. People start masturbating to what you're doing, or having sex while watching you. Hard to not enjoy that feeling, and it surpassed how intense I thought it would be.

Define star.

The days of genuine stars is either at its end, or gone, depending on who you ask.

But, as porn production expanded into the masses, you get more people working at small scale that have fan bases, if not the kind of draw power that can fill clubs on strip tours the way you could see in the 90s.

But, yeah, if you ran in the right circles back then, it was possible to encounter some of the bigger names at parties. The problem is that I was never into porn enough to recognize names unless it was a name big enough to have crossed into pop culture to a degree. Plenty of them did outcalls too, but that was never my scene.

So, back then, I did have sex with a couple of women that were porn performers, but they either weren't big names, or they at least weren't big enough I recognized them. Nor do I really remember what names I heard. Kind of useless tbh, for this.

The only one I remember by name that I met at a party, I didn't have sex with. That was Kobe Tai. As best I can remember, she didn't have sex with anyone but the guy she came with. I'm not even certain they did have sex, but they were making out.

The ones I did have sex with, it wasn't anything special. It wasn't bad at all, just not mind blowing. The one lady was essentially starfishing with everyone, and I suspect that she had been paid to show up and perform with guests. She was gorgeous, and her pussy was very alive despite her just laying there. Squeezing and almost rippling inside. Maybe that's why she was not moving much, to concentrate on that.

The other back then was more interesting. Again, no clue what her name was. I wouldn't have known she was a performer on film if I hadn't been told later. She was on a stage at one point, with a guy that was also a pro, but after their performance, she went around the party basically riding cocks for an hour or so; condoms mandatory. She made me come, and either faked one really well, or came as well. There was certainly a lot of internal action while she made a lot of noise lol.

More recently, back before I got married and settled into monogamy after a bad car accident, I did film a couple of scenes with a lady that did her own porn. I was masked, and it was BDSM based. So it was very fun, but definitely not something I could do regularly. Too many interruptions for the sake of filming things. I couldn't really get into the right head space for it to be fulfilling. Still a fun experience, just not the same as doing it for mutual pleasure.

Boring as hell in other words. I have a ton of great stories from my youth, but those aren't among them.

One part body language, one part voice control, and one part words

A lot of dominance is about how you approach a person, right? You tie them up, bend them over, whatever, but it's about establishing position. So when you can't touch or do that, you use your body. Get closer to them, inside their space. Loom over them, even if you happen to be shorter. By owning their space, you control their mind at least a little.

Then, you use your voice. Going deeper is helpful. A growled threat is often more effective than a slap, and it's almost always better than your normal voice. Volume matters, but not louder. You're in close already, so put some menace into your voice, lean in a little closer, and drop the volume. A little audible sneer may go well for a brat too.

When choosing words, I tend to like starting with questions, especially when someone is playing brat. You lure the brat out, ask them if they know what's going to happen if they don't obey. As soon as they start to answer, interrupt and tell them only to answer when told to. Ask again, let the brat start to surface and interrupt with a sharp sound, like slapping your own leg, or a table, then tell them you didn't say they could talk.

Some brats escalate, others are going to be shaken out of it since most brat play is about the acting out and eventual punishment. So, when you change the script, it flips a different switch in their head, it breaks out of the expected. When you do that, it doesn't matter if they escalate, because you double down on the quiet and forceful side or things. If it breaks them into being a good little girl the first few times, that's great too; nothing wrong with an easy move into their headspace.

You can, with a bit of luck and some practice, get some subs all the way into their subspace with no touches at all, if you keep ramping up the pressure by using your presence and voice.

It helps if you imagine them tied up or on their knees as well. Getting into the right metal space makes the performance easier because it stops being a performance, you become menacing and in control.

I can't promise it'll work, as obviously everyone is different, and your little brat may need a different scene. But it usually does work when doing something physical isn't possible.