Gormadt

Picture an 4 way intersection.

For me every single car just went about their way all willy nilly like it was nothing.

Occasionally a semi hauling triple trailers flys through grinding every else to a halt when everyone is trying to get through.

There's no order, the lights don't work, and almost no one wants to yield.

The cars were ideas, things I saw, and things I needed to do. The semi is my latest hyper obsession. The non functional traffic lights were my ability to regulate my thoughts.

When I took my meds it was like the lights started working suddenly. At first they were really strict, one car at a time like a highway on ramp. But then things amped down a bit as I got more used to the meds. I even went up to 60mg atomoxetine from 40mg where I started as things ramped too close to chaos again.

I hope that made sense.

My mind is with my 10mm sockets

Somewhere between Mars and the Sun, probably.

Surprisingly not so much... Mostly.

For me at least the hunger thing has a known origin, I had so much food scarcity as a kid and into my mid 20s that hunger is more of a suggestion than something that dominates my mind.

Hell it took years before it was more than just the occasional blip of "you should probably eat" that would quickly pass.

Now if I found a new hyper obsession, then I might forget to breathe (not a joke).

For me I have the urge to stand up but I can't bring myself to on many occasions and beat myself up about for too long.

It's gotten easier to stand up about things since I started taking meds.

In fact thinking back on it since I started my meds I've stood up almost every time.

Honestly life has gotten so much easier and better since then it's kinda crazy.

I wish I had gotten around to scheduling the appointment sooner.

Honestly I think you might be right

Since I've started my meds and some behavior changes along with them I have only been late 3 times, all traffic related. And I still managed to get stuff done those days.

Those first few weeks though were pretty damn stressful as I was suddenly finding I could manage my time.

Before getting diagnosed, the running joke was that I'd be late for my own funeral. I even joked with my family that in the event I did pass to have whoever brought my ashes to the BBQ to show up fashionably late in my honor as one last joke.