OldEggNewTricks

Previously...

Do you think she was trying to tell me something?

Eggy thoughts from my past self.

The final print volume of the manga is out, and I guess this will be the plot of the movie, so spoiler alert!

Is Makoto trans? IMHO, it doesn't matter, and that's the point. This is a really trans- and (queer-) positive story.

Aside from the obvious themes of trans presentation and queer romance (whether Makoto is trans or not then at least one of Ryuji and Saki ain't straight!), there is a very strong message of self-acceptance.

Makoto's grandfather's arc teaches us to accept ourselves, even at the potential cost of estranging our family (and although it isn't shown, it's pretty clear that the path is open for reconciliation with Makoto's mother). There's a great line from the neighbor too after doing Makoto's makeup: you decide whether it suits you!

The Ryuji/Saki + Makoto romance line is all about how there are people who will appreciate you for your true self, and you don't have to lose your friends.

Saki in particular struggles with what it means to find someone "special", and who she should live with: in the end she realizes you can just decide it for yourself! And also comes to understand that while her parents maybe fit the socially-expected role, it's the people that actually care for and are there for her (her grandmother and Makoto) that are important.

And then there's "I just want to live as me" Makoto. Maybe a femboy; maybe a trans girl; certainly exploring. This of course echoes that "but am I really trans" self-doubt, and the answer is: it doesn't matter! It's up to you! Just be yourself (can't be anyone else!). Makoto recognizes himself in his grandfather, and turns there for advice in the end. By the end of the story, all the characters are living more true to themselves, and are happier for it.

Plus seeing Makoto's hair gradually growing out hit me right in the feels 🥲

PS I only realized recently than Pom is also the creator of trans meme icon Kurumi-chan! (Menhera-chan) I hope we see more from this author in the future.

I mean it's not bad, but I still got that husky clocky thing going on. Still need to dial in the sharpness, get more consistent, and find the confidence to go all-in.

I always wondered why that line resonated with me so much... now I get it.

How exactly do you shave your back?

Sitting in my underwear, torturing myself with my new toy, I thought: "What I'm doing now is pretty fucking girly. I love it."

I can make all the sounds, but maintaining a feminine tone is still pretty hit-or-miss. Since I spend all day at work talking to my team online, I figured it would be good to use that time for voice practice. (I'm already out, so hopefully they won't think I'm going insane)

I've been slowly pushing the pitch up over the past few weeks to avoid straining, and with a pitch tracker going it looks like I'm sitting at around 150 Hz right now (for reference I usually aim for 200 Hz when training, which I can comfortably manage for short periods). Not quite target pitch, but at least I'm not dropping out of the androgynous range too often. End-of-day huskiness is slowly getting better but my resonance is all over the place.

Anyway, how do you all get your practice hours in? Any fun anecdotes? I'm still in awe of all the trans women on Youtube with perfectly passable voices.

I'm not complaining, mind.

Hello, everyone. Hopefully I'm not doxxing myself too badly if I reveal that I live in Japan, which is not a great place for trans healthcare.

The standards of care here are still from the stone age, and date from a prosecution under Japan's widely reviled eugenics laws (fortunately repealed in... 1996). Yes, that's right: the guidelines themselves state they're to protect medical practitioners.

The key requirement is to jump through enough hoops to convince your doctor that you really do know what you want, and then do it all again with another doctor, just in case the first one was biased towards the patient. The hoops include, potentially, genital exams, karotypes, interviews with family and coworkers, and RLE. There's no set timeframe, but six months to a year seems to be the standard. Only then can you access any gender-affirming care, including HRT.

Now fortunately there is a loophole. Any treatment started outside the scope of the guidelines can be taken over by the evaluating doctor concurrent with the inquisition. And, as it happens, I'm not personally bound to follow anything.

So, with the sound of a month's supply of my new favorite hormones in convenient gel form hitting the mailbox, I'm ready to start DIY! Hopefully my doctor (who I'm due to see for the first time in October) will be cooperative. From the sound of it a lot of people are using the same trick...

If you want to be a girl, you are one.

It took me a while to understand what people meant by that (or maybe I just couldn't accept it?). The difference between "I'm a girl and I like it", and "I want to be a girl" is simply one of perspective.

So it's almost exactly two weeks since my first session. I went to one of the high-power places that needs a medical license (at least in this country), but my somewhat light-colored hair and total lack of pain during the procedure made me really worried. The first week or so showed no progress, the hair seemed to be growing as normal. Then it got a bit thinner, or maybe I was imagining it?

But no, just today, it's been a whole day and almost no stubble or shadow! About 80% has just vanished (most of what remains is on my upper lip and beneath the jaw). I realize that the dormant follicles and so on are going to wake up soon, but I've still got several sessions to go.

So if you've just started and had the same worries as me, really: wait two weeks!

I am unreasonably excited about this. Sorry, past self who waited so long for his beard to come in: you don't need to worry about trying to look masc any more!