Casual Conversation

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RULES (updated 01/22/25)

  1. Be respectful: no harassment, hate speech, bigotry, and/or trolling. To be concise, disrespect is defined by escalation.
  2. Encourage conversation in your OP. This means including heavily implicative subject matter when you can and also engaging in your thread when possible. You won't be punished for trying.
  3. Avoid controversial topics (politics or societal debates come to mind, though we are not saying not to talk about anything that resembles these). There's a guide in the protocol book offered as a mod model that can be used for that; it's vague until you realize it was made for things like the rule in question. At least four purple answers must apply to a "controversial" message for it to be allowed.
  4. Keep it clean and SFW: No illegal content or anything gross and inappropriate. A rule of thumb is if a recording of a conversation put on another platform would get someone a COPPA violation response, that exact exchange should be avoided when possible.
  5. No solicitation such as ads, promotional content, spam, surveys etc. The chart redirected to above applies to spam material as well, which is one of the reasons its wording is vague, as it applies to a few things. Again, a "spammy" message must be applicable to four purple answers before it's allowed.
  6. Respect privacy as well as truth: Don’t ask for or share any personal information or slander anyone. A rule of thumb is if something is enough info to go by that it "would be a copyright violation if the info was art" as another group put it, or that it alone can be used to narrow someone down to 150 physical humans (Dunbar's Number) or less, it's considered an excess breach of privacy. Slander is defined by intentional utilitarian misguidance at the expense (positive or negative) of a sentient entity. This often links back to or mixes with rule one, which implies, for example, that even something that is true can still amount to what slander is trying to achieve, and that will be looked down upon.

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When I was a young child, I naïvely believed anything I experienced or that anyone told me as true. As I started adolescence, I started to question that, and realised that people who tell me stuff might be mistaken, or intentionally lying to me. I became very interested in optical illusions, and realised my senses could be fooled too. I had to rely on measurable, repeatable truth that scientific experts had written in pop science books.

Then I thought about simulations, being in a story (like in Sophie's World), gods, and every other possibility that the entire world I experience is not real and is created to test me, to observe me, indifferent to me and I'm there by accident - whichever it was, I couldn't believe for sure that anyone besides me really existed, or anything I knew through my senses. Only my logical reasoning could be trusted. I am doubting therefore I exist, but I couldn't know anything else for sure.

Until recently, I realised when I was ruminating one time, and thinking about which is better: truth or happiness. Most of the times I'd ruminated, I knew I'd come to the conclusion that I'd rather be right than happy. I had logic to back this up, it's more important to know the truth because then I'm happy about being right. But when I'd been happier, I thought being happy was more important than being right - after all, what's the point of being right if it doesn't bring you pleasure, seeking pleasure and avoiding suffering being the whole goal of life?

I realised that what I thought was logical reasoning to support my conclusion wasn't logical at all. It was a rationalisation to support whichever conclusion made me happier at the time. When, for chemical reasons in my brain, I was happy, I wanted to remain happy. So I'd subconsciously convinced myself that I had logic to convince myself that happiness is preferable. When my hormone levels were low so I was feeling down, telling myself that at least I feel better because I know the truth is a way of coping.

And I realised that when my 'logical' reasoning is just a rationalisation for an emotional state caused by brain chemicals and my body, I can't trust any 'logical' argument my brain thinks of. I don't exist because I'm thinking, I exist because I have an innate sense of existing. So therefore, I can't trust anything I think is logical. But wait, that there is a logical statement! So I can't trust it either! And so on... aaaAAARGH!

The more I try to find truth, the less I find I know. I somehow get even more agnostic than I thought it was possible to be, I at least thought, 'Alright, I have no idea what the universe is, but as an external observer I know that I exist.'

I am no longer an external observer! My observations about how my hormones and body affects my emotions, which in turn affect how infuriated I am at the fact that I don't know stuff, that I don't have free will - not the other way around - means I can't even think anymore, as my brain is part of the compromised system. I am compromised.

The more I learn, the less I know.

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Yorkshire tea is the only English tea allowed in my house.

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submitted 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
 
 

This has impacted my life so negatively I don't even know where to start.

My friends and I started drinking at 17 and went out almost every weekend. Every year we had huge events like festivals (Germany has many) and well those were like 3 days being drunk in a row.

If i could turn back time I'd probably just tell myself to not do it and probably do it again anyways.

I'm getting invested in the gym and it's so good. I wonder how I'd look like today if I would have just been at the gym in my 20s.

Not only that. I wonder how my friend circle would look like cause currently I have no friends I'd consider "friends". Those were all drinking buddies. They still drink every weekend and more and more I realised they are just functioning alcoholics.

And since I don't drink anymore (2 years) I'm basically out.

So I'd say alcohol didn't only have a negative impact on my brain while I was still young (and after) it also hit my wallet, my time for better things (sports).... etc.

Man. Sucks. Sucks to be me.

Now I am happy I have a wife, a house and going in the right direction but it is soooo hard to find friends or atleast people if you aren't in school anymore and coworkers busy with own life.

If I could give anyone younger advice I'd just stay screw it and go to the gym and find a hobby like climbing, swimming, golfing, tennis or something and get people there.

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I finished work a bit early today, went for a walk, met a friend at a newly opened pub, watched the football with a few pints and just got back home.

Another fun Friday to put into the box of fun Fridays

What's going on in your corner of the world?

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Any office shake ups? Are you thinking of changing jobs or doing further training? Drama, scandal?

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I've just got the hallway plastered gotta get it painted next week.

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I have a real addiction to soda and I desperately need to cut back at least on the sugar.

My problem is, is that the zero sugar ones - whatever sweetener is used hurts my throat (and tastes awful), and same goes for the diet versions. I could force myself to drink bubbly or La Croix, but knowing myself, that's only going to cause an awful rebound soon enough. So I've been trying to find alternatives that don't break the bank. Poppi is fine and I've tried other low sugar bottles from online stores here and there. That's expensive, though.

So I guess has anyone tried to cut sugar in other ways? I have tried watering things down and I've tried using just sparkling water to keep the carbonation but water things down. I have also tried sparkling water and powdered drink mixes and that is truly awful, imo. I haven't tried mixing a Soda Zero with a Soda (regular) and I wonder if that would help? At least to begin sort of a transition?

I dunno. I'm babbling at this point. I know it's mostly a test of will for addictions, but this is literally my only vice because I don't smoke and won't drink. So soda is the way, hahaha.

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It is a Ford e-transit. Huge white empty sides. I will implement my favorite idea without fail.

It's for transporting my disabled mother around, but also for personal use. (I am too tall for normal cars so this will be my only vehicle)

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I had butterbeans and veggie sausage stew with rice

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submitted 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
 
 

Electricians are here and are working in the unfinished attic over my head. I keep imaging dust raining down, or worse. My cat has developed a 1000 yard stare probably picturing 180lb squirrels walking across our rafters.

We've also hit out first unexpected snag. Hopefully first and only.

Super nice guys though, I feel bad for how often they keep getting hurt in my imagination.

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I decided that I had one too many large tables this week thats primary function just served to collect plates and trash.

I got rid of it and sort of had an existential moment of realization. I'm scraping the barrel on minimalism. Last year I moved into a small tent full time. Downsized my bed to a cot, made my own solar system, pump my water, and got rid of all my trinkets and toys.

I just don't have much left to get rid of. Not much left to store or organize. No need for large tables, my smaller collapsable tables do what I need. All thats left is bare essential appliances, clothing, bedding, and daily use devices. just a little more I wouldn't even need a shelf anymore.

I feel free. Like a weight is being lifted off of me. Possessing means maintenance and emotional attachment to objects. Each thing I get rid of feels like a win, like I'm letting go of something that I didn't really need. The few things that stay I truly appreciate for what they provide me in life.

But I feel like I'm kind of weird for feeling these way. Its the societal norm to collect things, compare social status with objects, show off your ideaologoies and interest by decorations. The 'dream' for most people is a big home to fill with a spouce, kids, and things.

People get mad at the idea of 'pod life' and 'owning nothing and being happy', which I understand its about being g forced into poverty not minimalistic zen type letting go of attachment. But I personally feel like theres too much hoarding and consumerism in daily life.

I wish that nomadic minimal lifestyles were looked better upon by society and not equated to homelessness. I don't have any stuff tying me down I want to explore my country without monthly apartment rents in an old van. Why is that wrong? Because I'm not making taxable property income or stimulating the economy with constant purchase?

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I always assume that my brain is structured in a way that at least 5% of people could relate to my general thought processes, but it turns out that some of my experiences of being a human are really just a "me" thing. I've often told myself that I'm just like everyone else, and that all of my personality traits are explainable by a mishmash of stereotypes and systemic influences. But I guess there's more to it than that, and I've been selling myself a bit short.

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how do I explode them with period cramps suddenly why is a spambot messaging me lmao

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I think people should pay (way) more attention to the domain name when creating a Lemmy instance. This is, of course, for admins of instances.

Instances such as lemmy.dbzer0.com and lemm.ee and such are just so unfriendly, in the name, that I think they do a disservice to Lemmy. They end up splitting the community. Due to the weird domain names, there will be privacy.lemmy.dbzer0.com, but the domain is just so unfriendly that people will also create privacy.lemmy.world and privacy.lemmy.ml and etc and it just creates unnecessary friction.

If you are considering creating a lemmy instance, please, please, think of the domain name. You cannot change it later!

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I mean:

English

Russian

French? (how did this happen? France --> French?!?)

Chinese

And someone from Afghanistan is an Afghan? How did the word get shorter not longer? 🤔

Also, why is a person from India called an Indian, but the language is called Hindi? This breaks my brain...

Philippines --> Filipino? They just saw the "Ph" and decided to use an "F"? 🤔

Okay idk how language even works anymore...

[This is an open discusssion thread on languages and their quirks...]

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Dude was like a pillar of the lemmy community and I believe a mod as well. I haven't seen him in weeks. Hopefully he's doing ok.

@[email protected]

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