Grogon

I am so exhausted.

My older brother has to be the most selfish egoistic person that exists on this planet. When I meet him everything is "fine" he talks like the friendliest person ever, always has a positive opinion about things and can generally talk very well.

My grandpa died a few months ago so my mother and her brother got the inheritance. Since my mother didn't want anything and left it to her brother our state by law asks the children of the next generation if they want to accept or refuse inheritance.

So my mom didnt want it and she told us to not accept it either. It would be 25% for me and 25% for him.

I said sure, fine - my brother was still thinking about it cause we own a small little "land".

Long story short: My brother talked with my oncle before hand and begged to give him the property and he wouldn't accept the inheritance in exchange. I didn't know about the deal and during all this I questioned the land with my mother and my brother as well but my brother kept saying: "We can't do that, it wouldnt be right to accept the inheritance if mom said we shouldn't."

End of story: I didn't accept it (moral reasons), my brother didn't accept it but he got the land and is now bragging around that he owns land.

I couldn't care less, I got my own stuff but I hate how he handled this whole shi.t making me look like a greedy dude in front of my mother cause I questioned it but during that time he already had a deal with my oncle about it.

Man I hate people.

This isn't the only thing I noticed. I am seeing very clearly 35 years too late. Everytime we go out with his kids I pay for his coffee, I pay entrance to stuff for his kids cause he says "You are the oncle you gotta do it once in a while". Last weekend I visited him for a coffee in his area and we went to the local coffee shop again. I already invited him 5 times and this time he said he would pay. Right before we had to pay he said he has to use the toilet and disapeared for 10 minutes until I was done paying. He does pulls that off every single time.

It's hilarious cause I never really bothered about those small things. Even my father, my stepfather and mother say he is a selfish person and my mother basically disinherited him a few years ago so I will be getting most of my mothers stuff when she passes away.

Yesterday was easter sunday. He visited the "new property" with his wife and children but only invited his wifes family to the BBQ event he planned for his new "yard". My mother, lives about 1 mile away from the property and she didn't get invited. It was her property. She was so mad when she found out they didnt invite her.

My mom called me and said it was the stupidest idea ever to let her brother have everything and if she would have known that my brother did such a deal she wouldn't have let this all happen. Now she has to live with the fact my brothers wifes family being on her old property. I cant pack this whole thing in the topic here but my mother isnt "good" with his wife.

I know I didnt get "ripped off" because I didnt own anything here. But I feel like my brother screwed me. I know I shouldnt feel this way cause it was never my inheritance to begin with.

I am always wondering and overcomplicating things in life and I have been posting quite a lot of questions here lately because I am just more confused the more I read.

I came to the conclusion that I absolutely might not need a rest day if I have the energy and motivation to go to the gym.

But I also can just quit going to the gym if I need more rest as well instead of just one rest day.

I have a few exercises that I know I can execute with a decent form. Probably not perfect but fine enough to not break me in the future so I just do them.

I feel like I have the best results in this kind of a mixed routine.

One week I do for example Push Legs Pull while moving Triceps from Push to Pull day and Biceps from Pull to Push day. This just feels way better than Chest + Triceps cause I have to lower weight for triceps exercises by almost 50% once I get to the exercise on chest day. Same goes for Biceps. Why biceps on pull day if I could just throw in a rest day after pull day and repeat again or heck, I can still go Push again with a bit lighter weight if I figure I don't need it.

So right now my routine is more like this: Monday: Chest + Biceps Tuesday: Legs (light) and bouldering (climbing) Wednesday: Back + Triceps Thursday: Cardio Friday: Upper Body (2 Chest, 2 Back, 1 Triceps 1 Biceps exercise) Saturday: Legs heavy Sunday rest.

But sometimes I don't feel the need to rest and I just add an arm day and after that I rest again.

It feels like I don't have a real routine but I am just juggling with the exercises I know and when to do them with the goal to hit most muscles 2-3 times a week.

After a pull day it sometimes feels wrong to not go to the gym the next day and just go for 4 biceps exercises so I just do that and call it a day.

I'm totally not sure about recovery in general but it might be taxing on my CNS but I just throw in a rest day here, a rest there and sometimes two days or heck even three days and go full into it again. Correct me if I am wrong but I think it could be a better idea to just listen to your body and not to a routine?

I just did Upper Lower + PPL (5 days) and tomorrow is sunday. Why should I stay at home tomorrow if I feel I can go hard on push tomorrow? If I go hard on push tomorrow I could still rest on monday and continue with legs and pull on tuesday and wednesday?

I don't look like Doc Mike, Chris Heria, Chris Bumstead and whoever is out there. But I also will never go as heavy as they go so it feels like that this whole recovery story on social media is more for the people who are really deep in the game but not for people who have so many sessions. Don't understand me wrong. Recovery is important and thats why I don't go to the gym every day. But sometimes it feels like working out chest and back twice is a week is perfect but my arms could actually need 3-4 workouts. Sometimes it feels like my legs only need one workout and I am dead the whole week so I won't do them twice. Just as an example...

I think waking up in the morning and doing whatever doesnt feel exhausted (worstcase soor) should be worked out. If I do chest monday and wednesday I feel like its fresh - why not just do Push again and move the pull to the next day?

But same goes the other way: Why should I go into my leg day if I am tired and exhausted from a heavy push day? Yeah my legs are fine but holy if my CNS is fried why?

Hey... I weight 76 kg, started at 83,8 kg in december 2024. Am 175 cm tall and eat about 2500 kcal and 1,6 gramms and more per kg bodyweight since december. Haven three days with less than 120g protein.

But my weight training sucks. I stsrted with 7,5 kg dumbbell presses and now I am at 12,5 kg. My barbell incline press was 2,5 kg each side now 7,5 kg so in total with barbell 35 kg.

Dunno what I am doing wrong? Doing Push Pull Leg 6 days a week, once I did PPL UL cause of time.

I feel so bad. Im doing everything I can

So I have been doing full body workouts the last months.

I switched to Push Pull Legs recently and it'sgoing quite well. PPLPPL Rest.

What I am asking myself though is do I have to be consistant with PPL so I reach 6 times a week?

What I mean does it have to be Push Pull Legs Push Pull Legs Rest or can I do that one week and the next week Push Pull Legs Rest Push Pull Legs?

Is it also okay to start the week with PPL and if I notice I have no time for 3 more times can I do PPL, Rest, Upper body, Lower body?

If I notice I have even less time, can I do PPL, Rest, >Full Body< Rest Rest?

So basically I should always benefit from PPL if I can guarantee atleast 4 times a week because I can always do Monday to Wednesday. Sometimes work and family kicks in and I cant add another cycle of PPL.

Am I giving this too much thought?

So last week I did PPL PPL Rest. This week I can do PPL and I will do Upper Lower Body on Friday and Saturday cause of work inbetween (coworkers got sick).. what do you guys think?

If this happens a lot, should I just stay with Upper Lower Body split instead and scrap PPL?

I like PPL currently but it sucks that I cant always guarantee 6 days time. I'd say every second week I can go 5 times... it never happend that I only did 4 workouts yet.

The question also could be: Is Push Pull Leg Rest Upper Lower Rest also viable? Is Push Pull Legs Rest Full Body Rest Rest also viable? Since I have to reduce my exercises in a upper body day and lower body day...

Basically my Upper Body day is nothing different than Push/ Pull, just two or three exercises less. But I keep the compound movements in it like Pull Ups and Dips, Benchpresses,... I scrap the isolated exercises though.

The reason I am asking this is because I heard PPL is useless if you only go 3 times a week. But how is it if I can atleast go 4-5x a week? To me it sounds actually quite decent since I can still focus on chest triceps etc. on mondays, back and biceps on tuesdays and legs abs on wednesdays. And I can still hit most muscles again if I do upper day and lower day instead of another round of PPL either way. Maybe not as effective cause I won't be doing flys and isolated triceps/ biceps exercises, but they still get hit a little bit twice?

Maybe someone can give me advice here or atleast confirm if my thought process is correct.

I currently weight 77,6 kg, 175 cm (male) and I am skinny fat. Meaning I am very skinny, have barely fat on my arms and legs but stored fat belly/ chest area.

So I calculated my kcal a day at about 2300 kcal. If I want to gain weight (muscles) with weightlifting I need a 200-400 kcal surpluss.

If I want to lose fat, which I also do (belly and chest) I need a deficit of 100-200 to maintain or gain slowly muscles while workout without losing muscles.

So I need 2200 kcal (maintain muscles, lose fat) to 2600 kcal (gain more muscles, not lose fat) a day to see gains everywhere and fat loss in belly/ chest area?

What is the best approach here? Lose fat in chest/ belly area first meaning going down to about 65 kgs first and then build muscles back to 75 kg or build muscles and lose fat later?

Obviously with the approach of going for 2200 kcal I might see slower muscle gaines but also fat loss, but also slower. I can't do both very fast if I don't commit to losing fat first or gaining muscles first.

So if I add cardio to my training programm I would have to eat all my kcal I have lost in the cardio session + the 2600 kcal surpluss resulting in about 3100 kcal a day to see gains. In other words: if I have problems eating a lot of food, which I do, I should avoid cardio currently?

This has impacted my life so negatively I don't even know where to start.

My friends and I started drinking at 17 and went out almost every weekend. Every year we had huge events like festivals (Germany has many) and well those were like 3 days being drunk in a row.

If i could turn back time I'd probably just tell myself to not do it and probably do it again anyways.

I'm getting invested in the gym and it's so good. I wonder how I'd look like today if I would have just been at the gym in my 20s.

Not only that. I wonder how my friend circle would look like cause currently I have no friends I'd consider "friends". Those were all drinking buddies. They still drink every weekend and more and more I realised they are just functioning alcoholics.

And since I don't drink anymore (2 years) I'm basically out.

So I'd say alcohol didn't only have a negative impact on my brain while I was still young (and after) it also hit my wallet, my time for better things (sports).... etc.

Man. Sucks. Sucks to be me.

Now I am happy I have a wife, a house and going in the right direction but it is soooo hard to find friends or atleast people if you aren't in school anymore and coworkers busy with own life.

If I could give anyone younger advice I'd just stay screw it and go to the gym and find a hobby like climbing, swimming, golfing, tennis or something and get people there.

I go to the gym a long time now but it seems like no one ever teached me how to do proper form on exercises.

Yeah I can watch youtube videos, but it still doesn't feel right.

My gym only has staff with 0 clue besides on machines, so I can't ask them. And I don't want to bother strangers.

My current way to deal with this is go to the gym at 4 am in the morning and hope no one is at the gym so I can just play around without people staring at me.

But then I am afraid to try a dead lift cause if something happens what then?

Was thinking about asking a member at the gym who looks decent to show me everything and I just pay him 50 $ but that seems kind of weird.

I can do a few basic exercises like Benchpress, Lat pulldowns etc. but I'd never squat with barbells or dead lift or anything like that cause it just looks like I'd break my back on accident. But those exercises seem to be the best and shouldn't be skipped (atleast what I read)

I really think my social anxiety is holding me back on this part of the gym. I know everyone says: "No one cares what you do they are focused on themselves" but lets be honest, people stare and wonder what you are doing... it's just what it is.

Currently doing Push Pull Leg routine with 5 exercises each day.

Pull: Lat Pulldown, Seated Cable Rows, T Bar Rows, Biceps Curls (Cable) and Cable Crunches

Push: Push Ups, Chestpress (machine), Butterfly (machine), Shoulder Press with Dumbbells, Knee Raises (body weight), Triceps Push Down (Cable)

Legs: Leg Press, Leg Extensions (Machine), Leg Curls (Machine), Crunches (body weight), 30 minute stepper low intensity

Is this okay?

I remeber 2006 I was in the 6th grade, all the world cup songs, chilling at my local lake with friends, ... maybe it was just because I was a young kid.

But now I think a lot about the 2000s.

I was able to download and Listen to All Songs of 60s, 70s, 80s, and the 2000s had great songs too.

Like Linken Park with Breaking a Habit or Red Hot Chili Peppers with Snow.

It was also a time I spent a long time in Azeroth (WoW) but also a lot of time in real life with friends.

Right now at this moment my job is awesome, I earn enough money, have a wife,... but I cant recreate the Summers of 2000s.

I said it in 2015 those were the best days and now a decade later I still say it. The 2016s to 2019s were also great. But not like 2005 to 2009. Something about those years that gives me a cozy Feeling.

Sonetimes I think Corona ruined everything. Nothing is back to how it was pre 2020. People are so confused, lie and cant tell the difference between fake news and Real news, all only on the phones.

This feels like Im living in a Shell that is empty now. And all this being said my Life SHOULD now be better than in 2006. I have a great job, money, more free time... but dunno.

Anyone else feel this?

I am not talking about the MRT system. I see that everyday.

I am currently in Singapore and I swear I haven't seen daylight in two days. My hotel is directly connected to this MRT and Mall. I am just underground and everything is so huge down here.

I wonder is this a city under the city?

It was all fun and games two years ago when most AI videos were obvious (6 fingers, 7 fingers, etc.).

But things are getting out of hand. I am at a point I'm questioning if Lemmy, Reddit, Youtube comments etc. are even real. I wouldn't even be suprised if I was playing Overwatch 5v5 with 9 AIs while three of them are programmed to act like kids, 4 being non toxic etc..

This whole place could just be an illusion.

I can't prove it. Its really less fun now.

The upside is I go to the gym more frequently and just hang out with people I know are 100% real. Nothing worse than having a conversation with AI person. It was just an average 7/10 like I am an average 5/10 so I thought it could be a real thing but turned out I was chatting with AI. A 7/10 AI. The creator made the person less perfect looking to make it more realistic.

Nice. What is the point of internet when everything is fake but can't even or only be identified as fake with deep research.

I'm 32 and I know many young people who also hate it. To be fair I only know people who hate on AI nowadays. This has to end.

Hey.

I thought giving inclined walking a try after I heard the hype about it and I am losing weight but it also could be just my change in foods since 2 months.

Either way, l have a feeling I ain't making progress. I started off at 15% incline, 30 minutes and kept my heartrate between 130 to 135. That was only possible at speed 3.5.

So starting: 30 minutes, 15% incline 3,5 speed.

Now after 7 weeks I am walking 60 minutes but didn't change the speed at all. The reason for not changing speed is that as soon as I increase from 3.5 to 3.7 (very slightly) my heartrate goes out of zone 2 into zone 3 (140-145).

Nothing seems to help this problem. 3.7 is basically my limit, no matter if I just start walking and slowly increase or didn't do pre workout. It's always 140 at that speed.

What can I do to progress instead of increasing time on the treadmil to 60 minutes? It's so time consuming and I'd rather just walk faster but a shorter time than longer but slower. My heartrate is limiting my pace though.

Today I gave it a new try. Two days rest and I didn't do my upper body workout just to check what happens. 15%, speed 3.5 -> after 5 minutes heartrate 128. After 10 minutes 135. After 15 minutes still 135 so I increase to 3.6. Now 139. Then to 3.7 and I am at 143.

I'm not even exhausted, I could do that easily one hour. But it's so time consuming. I need more miles in shorter time at my 130 heartrate instead.