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Men who are Sensitive AND Expressive, how do you cope? (lemmy.world)

submitted 3 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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I'm definitely a sensitive man. Like most sensitive men, I definitely find it challenging in the "yeah, you gotta eat 50 lb of bacon, pump iron 7x a day, never smile, and always take on a challenge" world of masculinity. I mean, we've definitely come a long way over the last decade making emotions something men can accept, but we got a long way to go.

Most articles I read about sensitive men are mostly about hiding it, how we're not supposed, to, and then when we do we'll feel better, blah blah blah. But I'm already expressive. I find it challenging, from both men and women.

From men, I don't feel like a man (I don't mean in the sexual sense...just from a psychological sense). In men's groups I get so tired of talking about work and (maybe) hobbies I just wanna run out of the room screaming. It's hard to find any other men who are okay talking about their feelings. When I do (I'm not afraid to), I find no one is able to relate.

From women, I think they often want to see me as a stereotypical stoic man. So when I do express myself, I'm seen as "not manly," which can be a turnoff, whether for romance or friendship.

So how do other sensitive men cope with expressing their feelings?

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I’m definitely a sensitive man. Like most sensitive men, I definitely find it challenging in the “yeah, you gotta eat 50 lb of bacon, pump iron 7x a day, never smile, and always take on a challenge” world of masculinity. I mean, we’ve definitely come a long way over the last decade making emotions something men can accept, but we got a long way to go.

Most articles I read about sensitive men are mostly about hiding it, how we’re not supposed, to, and then when we do we’ll feel better, blah blah blah. But I’m already expressive. I find it challenging, from both men and women.

It seems the media you're consuming about manhood is disturbing at best. Based on this men who don't eat meat, smile, and have a desk job are women. That's just simplistic childish thinking. You know that's nonsense.

A good man is in touch with his feelings. No one wants a man to hold everything in until they explode. That's boomer-coded.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago (1 children)

You just reminded me that I knew a boomer who would constantly say how important it was to be in touch with your feelings. He was really proud of himself for painting his bedroom pink (for his wife, I guess, who didn't actually care what color it was). Dude was still abusive AF. It was very confusing.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago

You had me thinking he was a winner until that last bit 0_o