this post was submitted on 10 Mar 2024
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If dogs go to heaven, then what do they eat there?
Doggy heaven is squirrel hell its a very efficient system.
Cats. Cats are evil and go to hell. Their hell is to be food for heaven's carnivores.
Who hurt you?
Most likely a cat
Cats are notorious dicks. Why act surprised? 🙀
Meanwhile I've owned dozens of cats and no dogs and have more scars from dogs than cats
I bet if the cats weighed 90 lbs that'd be a different ratio but the lack of opportunity is still a point in their favor.
No housecat is going to maul a child if they jump your fence either.
Those claws can hurt you man, they're sharp as hell, but they choose not to use them
In aus at least cats are pests that kill baby birds are single handedly responsible for putting hundreds of speicies on the endagered spieces list and have helped many go extinct so maybe a cat didnt hurt him maybe a cat just hurt the enviroment he loved.
Yeah cats kill birds like no other. They help us humans to extinct a few more species, best bros ever.
Doesn't matter, for each dead bird we breed 100 chicken that get produced into nuggets.
Those billions of chickens wouldnt exist if it wasnt for humans WE ARE their evolutinary niche we are the very reason they exist. And well we aint making chickens extinct are we.
Hell yeah bro. The only reason those chickens get to live a grueling two months inside a hot, windowless shed caked in filth, barely able to stand because they've been bred to grow so large is because of us humans. You're welcome chickens.
What about those poor bacteria living in our assholes in a windowless gut caked in filth unable to stand is because co-evolution with humans your welcome shit eating bacteria.
What about them?
Cats go to hell and they enjoy it there.
Cats are mirrors.
Damn people took this way too seriously lmao
Lab grown meat
Labrador meat is premium, it really has to be heaven https://www.elwooddogmeat.com/meet-the-dogs
Would anyone or anything in heaven eat? Hunger is but a manifesting of the unimmaculaticity of flesh.
Well done. A google search results in zero hits for unimmaculaticity.
Thanks, it is fun to play with language. I almost went for the more boring "maculate".
I find something comedic about a Germanesque mash of prefixes and suffixes. Maybe one day I'll stumble across a newfangled word that can live in the cupboard of our collective vocabulary.
Unimmaculaticity lives in my word cupboard now
Nothing. They do nothing but sit at the feet of god's throne and worship him for all eternity.