this post was submitted on 20 Jun 2024
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Good god man…. Songs should be written about you and performed during a presentation of a statue in your likeness.
Honestly I really should just be locked away for everyone's, and my own, safety.
I was one of the original patients that spread swine flu in the US in 2009 after a trip to Mexico. I now have vaccines for everything from yellow fever to typhoid cause I thought I might spread it too.
My stories should probably be in a leather bound book of things not to do that people argue whether or not it's allegorical when it says "do not trust the boy who brings back diseased cloth for all his friends"
Edit: same vacation I broke 6 ribs falling off a cruiseship and had to be rescued by the Mexican coast guard actually.
Train wreck.