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Look, I get it. The gargantuan shit-show that is U.S. politics and the American descent into fascism is on everyone's minds. It's certainly on mine.

But the point of this community is to highlight weird news stories that make you go, "By golly, I thought I was reading a headline from The Onion. You know, America's finest news source." A lot of stories being posted lately don't even remotely fit that.

That doesn't mean political stories aren't allowed here, but they must have headlines that would make people pause and wonder if it's a story from The Onion. Straight up regular, non Onion-y headlines don't fit.

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The UK's new act blocks access to adult content without identification. Turns out, you only need a copy of Death Stranding and a phone to get around it.

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the latest incident has led to more questions for the MTA and police, who so far have not said why this keeps happening. [...] Some riders have theorized that it could be a runaway string from local kite fighting contests

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To quote a random commenter:

"Well it is impressive... impressively bad."

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A four-story-tall movie screen in the parking lot of Tesla’s Hollywood Diner & Drive-In is now blocking the view from a nearby apartment complex.

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WASHINGTON (AP) — A day after Donald Trump threatened to hold up a deal for a new football stadium in the nation’s capital if the Washington Commanders did not go back to the name Redskins, White House press secretary Karoline Leavitt said the president’s comments were not a joke.

“The president was serious,” Leavitt told reporters Monday while answering questions on the White House driveway. “Sports is one of the many passions of this president and he wants to see the name of that team changed.”

Asked why he’s getting involved, Leavitt called Trump a “nontraditional president” and said sports fans are behind him on this.

“I think you’ve seen the president gets involved in a lot of things that most presidents have not,” Leavitt said. “He’s a nontraditional president. He likes to see results on behalf of the American people and, if you actually poll this issue with sports fans across the country, and even in this city, people actually do support the president’s position on this and the name change.”

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Not The Onion

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Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Please also avoid duplicates.

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