No, but I did go to the principals office and they went to the nurse. That was over thirty years ago though.

People who are trying to make the most of a lunch break

I’d probably guess the Italians

My dad. He drinks coffee with everything, including his coffee.

An adhd-haver who’s on their third cup of the day at lunch, and will have 3 more over the course of the afternoon.

Why not? You can even use some pasta as a straw

Me, 5 minutes ago. What's so special about pasta and coffee combo?

i will drink coffee with anything. yogurt, salad, chips and salsa, tofu, the list goes on.

You've got to suck really hard to leverage surface tension while fisting.

Pro move but it can be done

is this real

I have stabbed no one because I'm not insane. Different strokes I guess

If it's on or near my plate I'm gonna try and eat it. It's called finger food for a reason.

Just quickly lean towards their hand and snap your teeth like you're going to bite. Works with all sorts of unwanted touching, just be ready to actually bite if they're also nuts and try again to call your bluff. Even if they get angry they're much less likely to want to throw hands with the high possibility of getting bit hanging in the air.

The downside is you will look even more insane than with just fork stabs, but on the plus side you will look insane enough people will stay the fuck away in the future too

Honestly? Those break room hostilities can get intense. I learned at a young age to not fuck with a salaried man's luncheon. I believe it.

Smashburger

Delicious. Get you a double cheese from last night and nuke it for 30-45 seconds. Done and easy lunch.

Nah touching someone's food is weird.

Even if they were trying to flirt, being told repeatedly not to do something that they keep doing anyway is not flirting.

I think you need to learn how to flirt

By touching his food?

Everyone doesn't have those kinds of fetishes