this post was submitted on 30 Apr 2024
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Not The Onion

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[–] [email protected] 159 points 1 year ago (1 children)

She said her homeowner's insurance won't cover anything pest-related because they deem it preventable.

So the real monster was the insurance company. What a twist!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

And yet people still pay for insurance, for some reason.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

My bank forces me to have insurance in order to get a mortgage :(

[–] [email protected] 41 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 40 points 1 year ago (1 children)

So she was basically correct.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 1 year ago (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 year ago (2 children)

60,000 of anything is basically a monster. I wouldn't even want to be confronted by 60,000 koalas.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

Title of your autobiography!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

60,000 Guinea pigs

Prepare to be wheeked to death

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That's exactly what a bee would say. 🐝🤔

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Shh! Don't make us sting you 😤

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If they're pissed off enough to swarm in the tens of thousands, they are temporarily..

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

FYI. The quantity of bees in a hive has more to do with their ability to find good food sources nearby, and the suitability of the place they've made their home, and nothing to do with their temperament. That size hive would not be considered particularly remarkable in an apiary. A "swarm" of bees is actually just a bunch of bees that split off from a successful hive and are looking for a new home and are typically very docile. Since this colony had a home (these people's house), it was technical not a "swarm."

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Thanks for enlightening me, I sit corrected 😁

[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 year ago

When I was very little, maybe 2, my mum had sat me down in front of Sesame Street while she did some chores. Not long after I came running into the kitchen “mummy mummy there’s a birdie in the front room!” She said yes, that was big bird and to go back in and watch it. I kept running back to her increasingly more upset about the birdie until she came into the living room to find a pigeon had come down the chimney and was irately trying to escape. I know I was too young to remember it, but I swear I can recall the feeling of vindication!

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Meanwhile, the Beekreeper escapes the scene unnoticed and prepares to summon its apian horde elsewhere.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

Shoutout to the absolutely fantastic pen&paper RPG "Heart" in which one of the classes is the Deep Apiarist. Including the ability to have the bees crawling through your body that doubles as their hive animate it while you sleep, allowing you more active hours a day.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Had something similar. My bedroom was small and under the roof, and for some time I heard scratching noises at night over my bed. I assumed that were mice, so I set up some mouse traps in the attic. No success. The bait was gone, but none of the traps were sprung.

So, one evening when the noise got annoying, I went to investigate closely. And found a large wasps nests, right on the other side of the sheet rock of my bedroom.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

This is why flamethrowers are legal to own in 48/50 US states.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I have a drone on offer up and some fool tried to convince me to trade for a flame thrower. Wtf am I going to do with a flame thrower? I guess I could vanquish my enemies... If I had any. People are weird.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It seems they had the same thought "Crap, what can I do with this flamethrower? Maybe I can trade it for that drone!"

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Jesus. That sounds eerily like my experience. Heard scracthes in the attic and thought it was mice. Woke up one morning with a dead wasp in the bed and having been stung. Thought nothing of it. Woke up a few days later with two dead wasps in the bed and having been stung. Huh, that's weird. Then when I woke up one morning I saw a wasp crawl between the planks in the ceiling. Called exterminators and they sprayed the attic. The wasps had built their nest in the isolation and had chewed through it down to the planks... The next week I had hundreds of dead (and a few alive) bees in the room every day and I had to sleep on the sofa..

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (3 children)
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[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I can't believe it's not posted here yet, so here we go.

Ehm.

NO, NO, NOT THE BEES! ALL OVER MY EYES! AARGHHH

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Not if you use the same insurance company.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago

[email protected]

This is the worst thing I've read today

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

This looks like a job for... DR. BEES!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

As reported by the Bee Bee, See.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

So she was obviously lying and maligning the bees.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

Oh man, just heard about this in my beekeeping class.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Too soon to watch Bee Movie?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Ya like jazz?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

My suitcase full of BEES should help with that!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Has this been happening for a while? How tf did this happen?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago

It's not that uncommon. When a beehive is doing really well, it'll "split", meaning they'll raise a second queen and the new queen will leave and half of the colony will go with her to establish a new hive somewhere. This is called swarming, and it's the their version of reproduction. (Tangent: Contrary to popular belief, honey bee swarms are usually very docile since they don't yet have a home to defend.) Once they find a suitable location to settle, they'll move in. Without humans building things, a suitable location would usually be something like an old hollowed out tree. But humans build great beehive homes. Old houses with small openings between siding panels that allow bees into the walls are a common favorite.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Behold my children:

Saylor Class, Dance Lesson, Computer Science Tutorial and Intro To Biology

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