this post was submitted on 06 Mar 2025
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62
Diagnostic dilemma: Speed eating a 7-pound burger sent a man to ER unable to pass gas (www.livescience.com)
submitted 2 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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[–] [email protected] 24 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

The whole concept of eating contests has always appalled me.

Like most kids of my era, mom would always guilt me into finishing my dinner because "there are starving kids in Africa that would would love to have that plate of Brussels sprouts." So even back then, my mind couldn't reconcile the fact that we all know there are starving kids in the world but also we have competitive eating contests.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

I feel similar, but for billionaires. I've done medical volunteer work in Bihar, one of the poorest states of India. Seeing these rich fucks do things like private jet across LA because traffic sucks blows my mind.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

7 pounds is a lot of hamburger.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago

To Beard Meets Food it's just the entree

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I’m always perplexed by these challenge foods. They look pretty universally terrible. “Shovel the garbage from the last 6 tables down your throat within one hour and your meal is free!”

Just make the item appetizing. Please. Or can I bring my own sauce for your dry-ass steaks and overcooked burger patties so I can at least enjoy my food while it kills me?

[–] [email protected] 23 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

I've always enjoyed the story of the Heart Attack Grill in Vegas... they serve obscenely large portions, and the kicker is that there's a giant scale at the front - if you're over a certain weight, you eat free. Which sounds awesome as a fat guy, except...

The owner has been very up-front about his motivations. He hates fat people, to the point that he thinks they deserve to die, and has determined the best way to accomplish that is his restaurant.

People are crazy.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

IIRC the owner is a doctor who gave up and opened the grill.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago

Who could have guessed that consuming 7lbs of burger in 30 minutes would be bad for you?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

There are much easier ways to keep yourself from passing gas. Like a butt plug.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

But will that work for a whole weekend?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago

This will require rigorous scientific testing.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

That's how you make a bazooka. Or a buttzooka.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I need a SQUID recording of when he finally farted so I can ride the lightning

[–] Big_Boss_77 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Care to Elaborate?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Boomer ass reference

[–] Big_Boss_77 3 points 2 weeks ago

Lmfao...

I thought that's what you were referring too... but then I'm like "What if it's some medical chart like an ECG that looks like a lightning bolt???"

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

That's a different kind of butt plug if I've ever seen one... Maybe the guy should have tried eating it instead.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

At first glance I read "Speed dating a 7-pound burger (...)" and was confused.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

Paging ChubbyaEmu

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

SBO

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

This guy watched BeardMeatsFood and thought, yeah, I could do that too.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

I love Beard but he's nowhere near one of the world's top eaters. He just has better personality and content than most. I've completed a handful of huge eating challenges myself, but I did fail the last one I tried. I'm getting too old for that stuff.