Unpopular Opinion

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Ghosting isn't nearly as problematic as relevancy when it comes to friends (kbin.melroy.org)

submitted 1 week ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

3 comments fedilink hide all child comments

People today cannot go a moment without crying about how they've been ghosted by someone else. But they don't really think about relevance when it comes to gaining friends and maintaining them.

People are so easy to let go of someone because they haven't had a 'hi' from them in a couple days or a week. I think that's too petty. Are you meaning to say that people are not allowed to tend to things they find more important? To other people they may find more important than you?

All I ever ask from my friends is to at least talk to me within a year, something anything. Doesn't have to be on a constant basis, we'd run out of subjects and updates.

I always feel like people should evaluate friends based on relevancy. How much do they mean to you? What have they done recently that makes the friendship itself feel like it's gotten an update? Is the mutual bond still there?

Things like that. Simply throwing a fit because someone hasn't spoken to you in a day or even a few hours kind of suggests that maybe you're an insecure friend.

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[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 hours ago* (last edited 11 hours ago)

It's really simple and has nothing to do with the topic of this post.

It's the internet. There is a certain level of perceived anonymity, therefore, the internet is filled with people complaining.

Getting ignored upsets people. They go online to complain about it.

It's not that deep. This goes for pretty much anything that the internet gives a platform to for complaining about.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 week ago

The problem isn't so much with not receiving a hi or any conversation starters, but from being ignored for days, despite the other person receiving and reading the messages. Ignored once? Understandable. Twice? Weird, but happens. 5 messages read and ignored? Ok, something's off, the person is being an asshole.

Constant online communication is ruining shit for us, tho. We want everyone to reply NOW, depending on settings we can tell whether they got the message and then we can get pissy on being ignored.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 week ago

I go about six months to a year between hearing from or reaching out to certain friends. We have busy lives and live far apart. I hadn't seen some friends in years and finally took a road trip to two cities to see people in 2023. It'd been over a decade since I'd seen one of the friends.