When will I become a Spider-Man?
this post was submitted on 21 Mar 2025
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We stole the method of making smoothies from spiders. A bug is surrounded with an exoskeleton and full of goopy flesh. Spiders liquify and drink their insides. A banana has a convenient wrapper and is full of soft banana flesh. Spiders do the same thing for bananas.
The original method for making banana smoothies was to let a spider bite a banana and then take the banana away before the spider can drink it. Over time humanity lost this knowledge and became reliant on demonic technology (blenders) to make smoothies.
The spiders, however, have not forgotten. After so many generations of being denied bananas they developed a genetic hunger for them. That's why they try so hard to crawl on the bananas and that's why they are so good at hiding and stopping us from noticing them being on our bananas.
aw hell nah the spiders got timbs now?
Had?... HAD... what a ripoff!
I for one prefer all natural pest control