You will encounter this man at work.
They will ask for your help with something on their workstation, and it would be faster for you to drive with them watching over your shoulder, but this cryptic thing is their keyboard.
Instead, you will be forced to sit behind them like Patrick Swayze guiding Demi Moore at a throwing wheel. You will eventually take your shirt off, launch Unchained Melody in Spotify, then slowly guide them through a system setting panel.
You will notice how soft their hands feel. The hyper-ergonomic keyboard has allowed their fingers to move with minimal effort, allowing the skin to remain supple, smooth - almost unused.
You will ask yourself, “Is he right?” How could a keyboard be so aggressive and wrong, and yet, support something so gentile.
You try to deny the feeling. Your friends and family will mock you like your uncle Dvorak. Maybe you start with a trackball and see if being naughty feels right.