this post was submitted on 05 Jun 2025
173 points (100.0% liked)

Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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(all "punishments" are actually rewards)

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[–] [email protected] 85 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I have to admit I'm stumped on this one. I hear that puppies hate vacuum cleaners, so maybe stick a dildo on a roomba and see where that goes.

[–] [email protected] 55 points 1 month ago (1 children)

so maybe stick a dildo on a roomba and see where that goes.

I genuinely can't tell if this is a deliberate double entendre or not...

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

If it's a decent model it'll go practically everywhere until it goes under the bed where it'll get stuck on a sock or something.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

It's the 'something' that makes me nervous >.<

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 weeks ago

Any rational person should know that there aren't any sexually deviant clowns hiding under your bed waiting to get fucked by a Roomba riding dildo...

But there's always a chance!

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago

That's for catgirls, i don't think puppy girls sit on roombas.

[–] [email protected] 41 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Hey, it's illegal for a greentext to be this real.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Real and ... straight? No, doesn't work.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Gay: they're both women

Fake: women on 4chan

[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 month ago

If the punishment doesn't turn them on, what is even the point of doing the roleplay? 🤨

[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Isn't it obvious?

A rolled up newspaper.

What you do with it is up to you. Or up them, I guess.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

Spray bottle

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago

What in tarnation

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

Rub her noes in it.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

Reverse puppygirl hypno videos

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Have you heard of "Leopold's apple"?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

It’s all about that 1-day blinding stew

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago