BUT WHOSE POOP WAS IT?
Not The Onion
Welcome
We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!
The Rules
Posts must be:
- Links to news stories from...
- ...credible sources, with...
- ...their original headlines, that...
- ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”
Please also avoid duplicates.
Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.
And that’s basically it!
It was his.
The Ohio Supreme Court suspended an attorney who defecated into a Pringles potato chip can and then tossed it into a parking lot of a crime-victim advocacy center.
Not that he isn't a dickhole, but...that'll...show them...? How did anyone else even notice this enough to care? Someone so poorly underpaying the cleaner guy that he opened a discarded parking lot pringles can in search of food?
He drove past the ... victim advocacy center ... and was captured on surveillance cameras throwing the can into the center's parking lot. One of the center's employees ... saw Blakeslee throw the can from his car and recovered it in the parking lot... [and] called police to report the incident and the attorney was eventually charged with misdemeanor counts of disorderly conduct and littering.
Well, poop analysis showed there were wolf hair and pieces of credit card in it. So, still inconclusive.
Blakeslee tried to explain away his behavior, saying he hadn’t targeted Haven of Hope. Rather, he claimed, he was indulging a frequent habit of his, having done the deed at least 10 other times that year.
That somehow sounds even worse to me.
How do you poop while driving? How do you poop into a Pringles can without missing the can?
I understood it as “pre-prepared poop Pringles”
We keep talking like it was planned but maybe it was a crime of passion.
Passionate pringle pooping.
Fiber, and fiber.
Big Police Squad energy there.
"Who are you? How did you get in here?"
"I'm a locksmith, and I'm a locksmith."
New skill unlocked.
The article says he has been practicing law since 1976, if he finished law school at age 25 he is 72 years old.
I don't know what to do with this fact. There is a +72 year old man doing this.
Ah the 70-teens
The ole Chicago Pringle Can, good one Jimmy!
He SHIT into a PRINGLES CAN!
Slippin' (in shit from a Pringles can) Jimmy.
He DEFICATED in a pringles can! and he gets to be a lawyer? what a sick joke!
Not just one. The article says he did it at least 10 times previously in that year because throwing pringle poop is a habit he likes to indulge in.
He threw it out the sunroof!
and he gets to be a lawyer?
No, title is quite clear that the Piero Manzoni wanna be got suspended.
It's a reference from Better Call Saul.
I should've stopped him when I had the chance! And you – you have to stop him! You-
Saul Goodman.
What is the world coming to where a man can't poop in a can and toss it out their car window in an act of defiance. Damn Bidens America!!!
That's some next level Pringles guerilla marketing.
I know they say all press is good press, but I don't know if Pringles wants their brand to be associated with a cardboard tube full of shit...
Always has been.
As bad as feces is at least it is biodegradable. Even insects and bacteria won't put Pringles into their body.
Pringles: Now they just taste like shit!
This is appropriately posted into au.sports section on yahoo.
The olympics gonna be wild next time.
Did he manage to poop in the can, or was it a two step process? As in he pooped somewhere else and then shoveled the poop into the can?
And here I thought this was America, land of the Free…
You mean America, the land of the heavily propagandized
Police were suspicious when they noticed the can smelled better than actual Pringles.
Forget the trowing part, I can not stop thinking about this man shitting into a pringles can (I hope that is how he loaded it).
This isn't news! News would be a Pringles can not full of poop.
Sounds cathartic.
Whenever I feel bad about myself, an article like this pops up to remind me that despite all my flaws, I’m not the guy throwing faeces in public like some random monkey. Thanks for that.
I’m not the guy throwing faeces>
But you could be.
Yeah, but I hear the bar exam is a bitch.