this post was submitted on 24 Apr 2025
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Ye Power Trippin' Bastards

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This is a community in the spirit of "Am I The Asshole" where people can post their own bans from lemmy or reddit or whatever and get some feedback from others whether the ban was justified or not.

Sometimes one just wants to be able to challenge the arguments some mod made and this could be the place for that.


Posting Guidelines

All posts should follow this basic structure:

  1. Which mods/admins were being Power Tripping Bastards?
  2. What sanction did they impose (e.g. community ban, instance ban, removed comment)?
  3. Provide a screenshot of the relevant modlog entry (don’t de-obfuscate mod names).
  4. Provide a screenshot and explanation of the cause of the sanction (e.g. the post/comment that was removed, or got you banned).
  5. Explain why you think its unfair and how you would like the situation to be remedied.

Rules


Expect to receive feedback about your posts, they might even be negative.

Make sure you follow this instance's code of conduct. In other words we won't allow bellyaching about being sanctioned for hate speech or bigotry.

YTPB matrix channel: For real-time discussions about bastards or to appeal mod actions in YPTB itself.


Some acronyms you might see.


Relevant comms

founded 9 months ago
MODERATORS
 

There's a post about it.

That post explicitly says it's not a place for debate or participation from users of other instances.

I'd like to respect that but I think events like this need debate and discussion because it helps to develop and evolve the culture of lemmy and the fediverse in general.

The post says:

This post is "FYI only" for blahaj lemmy members. It is not a debate, and is not intended for non blahaj lemmy users to weigh in and offer opinions.

I recently received reports of a feddit.uk user espousing transphobia. Specifically, this was a feddit.uk user refusing to use the word cis, repeating the "adult human female" dog whistle, and claiming that trans women are not women. I approached a member of the feddit.uk admin team and raised my concerns and sought clarification of their stance on posts like this, where the transphobia is mostly dogwhistles, and "civil disagreement" on the validity of trans folk.

I was told by the feddit.uk admin that their preferred response is this kind of transphobia is to "sort it out through discussion and voting". However, the comments in question are currently more upvoted than downvoted, and little "sorting out" has occurred. The posts remain in place.

At this point, the admin stopped responding to my messages despite being active elsewhere on lemmy. When it became clear they were ignoring my messages and had no intention of removing the posts in question, I made the decision to defederate the instance.

I know some folk agree with the feddit.uk admins approach of pushback through discussion and voting, but this instance is not designed to be that kind of space. Blahaj lemmy is meant to be a place where we can avoid the rampant transphobia universally visible on nearly every other social media platform, and where we can exist without needing to debate our right to do so.

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[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (56 children)

So some feddit.uk user posting some stuff an Blahaj admin didn't like. So the Blahaj admin want to a feddit.uk admin about it. The feddit.uk admin said, "Let the users sort it out.". People liked what as being said. This made the Blahaj admin so mad. They defederated from feddit.uk because over it.

Jesus, Blahaj always been full of crazy people. But this takes the cake. The feddit.uk admin did nothing wrong.

EDIT If you see a post/comment you don't like. You don't ban or defederate. You write an counter to them to get people to be on your side of it.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (42 children)

That's not how it works.

Moderating means filtering out content that is unwelcome or even harmful to your users.

Sure, you can get into it and have a talk, try to modify the persons behaviour. But you don't moderate for the offenders sake. You moderate for your users sake.

So, as a user, you can dive in and talk counterarguments. As a mod, you get rid of that shit ASAP before any of your users suffer the misfortune of having to see it.

Where that line is, depends on who you are, and who your users are. That's the whole beaty of the fediverse. People with different needs can sign up on different instances, with different rules and standards.

Admins can't control the content of other instances, so when another instance refuses to work with you to uphold a given standard, defederation is the only, and correct, recourse.

The whole point of blahaj, is that they go the extra mile to protect vulnerable users, so they can engage with social media on their own terms.

If someone wants unfiltered content, and to engage this stuff directly by "writing counters", they can go create accounts somewhere else. Blahaj isn't for that. It's for people who don't want to, or might not even have the energy, to justify their basic right to exist.

And that's before pointing out that no-one should have to do that in the first place.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (5 children)

If someone wants unfiltered content, and to engage this stuff directly by “writing counters”, they can go create accounts somewhere else. Blahaj isn’t for that. It’s for people who don’t want to, or might not even have the energy, to justify their basic right to exist.

Okay, how can you get more to join your side. If you don't have discussions with other people? You can't. Have fun in your echo chamber.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

"How can you get people to stop stabbing you, if you don't let them into the room so you can explain why they should stop?"

We can't all be soldiers. You can't expect everyone to take the knife over and over until the world gets better.

Good thing is, we can do both. You and me, we can have a talk about this. I'm ready and willing. Maybe I'll even convince you.

And it doesn't require exposing everyone over on blahaj to your bigoted bullshit.

Echo chambers are only a problem if there are no people who move between them. And trust me, vulnerable people can only protect themselves so much. They'll get shit thrown their way no matter what, the world is still far too fucked to prevent that. All you need to do to see that, is look up the suicide rate among trans people.

That's why every word with scorn behind it, counts. The less of them a person has to deal with to begin with, the more likely they are to be alive tomorrow.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (2 children)

your bigoted bullshit.

Maybe I’ll even convince you.

You're doing a great job.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

I am.

I have you pointing out my strong language, instead of dismantling my logic.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

If you want to convince someone to join your side. Don't call them a bigot.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Fair. But the things you are saying are bigoted.

Doesn't mean you are one, just that you need to re-evaluate your views.

And, failing to counter my point, already takes you halfway to realizing I might be saying something worth listening to.

Think about it some more. If I'm wrong, all it'll do is allow you to figure out how wrong. If I'm not, then by changing your mind you'll just end up being more right.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Also, how is "countering and getting people to your side" working for you?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Good. Because my point is to get people to discussions with other people.

Also when did I say I was against trans people?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 week ago (2 children)

You didn't.

The opinion you are presenting, is against their safety, though.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Ah yes, the evergreen 'If you disagree, I'm going to imply that you're transphobic/against trans people' argument.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Hardly.

Pointing out the inherent issues in a view that someone holds, is basic arguing.

People have opinions all the time without fully realizing every potential implication. That doesn't mean they subconsciously endorse every possible adverse effect their political preferences might hold.

If you can't point out the gotchas that a person might not have noticed in one of their adopted beliefs, what else is left when it comes to changing someone's mind?

Insults?

People can be racist, transphobic or any manner of discriminatory, entirely without meaning to. And if they aren't realizing what they are doing, someone has to point it out.

Are you suggesting people just suffer with it until they wise up?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I am suggesting that ad hominem and non sequitors are the tools of non-serious people who are more interested in performative commenting than having a conversation.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Did you have an actual counterpoint in there?

A little linguistic color hardly disqualifies a point. And if you can't see the relevance of my analogies, that's your problem. I'm not interested in dumbing it down even more.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 week ago (1 children)

If you can't understand my point then I'm not going to draw you a picture.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

No. I got it.

You think a single insult buried in a logical argument disqualifies the whole thing.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (2 children)

The comment thread started with a person explaining the importance of discussion in winning over allies and avoiding creating an echo chamber. You implied that their suggestion was making trans people less safe.

That does not follow, it isn't an attempt to address their point. It is a non sequitor.

It is simply changing the conversation topic by accusing the person of a harm in order to make them defend themself rather than addressing the topic at hand (i.e. Creating an echo chamber is bad, conversation is good).

You think a single insult buried in a logical argument disqualifies the whole thing.

You're not engaging in a conversation. A conversation requires a good faith effort to understand the other side. Using logical fallacies to discredit the other person is not something done in good faith. It isn't a single insult, it's the rhetorical tactics that you're using.

It's possible that you don't realize what you're doing. Maybe you grew up on social media where this kind of thing can appear acceptable (or, at least, gets upvotes because its outrageous behavior).

Or maybe you're a little older and wiser and know exactly what you're doing, but think that the ends justify the means. So you're just getting some good shots in on the other for your side and ignoring the human being on the other end.

Either way, it's toxic.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

You implied that their suggestion was making trans people less safe.

No I didn't. I said so. Because it IS so.

And I didn't lead with that. I lead with explaining that we can have both safe places, AND discussion. That this isn't a zero sum game.

Safe spaces are not a bad thing. Echo chambers are only echo chambers if the people inside them don't move in and out as needed. Which at least I do, do.

Discussion is good, but it cannot be mandatory, as those who cannot, do not want to, or are not ready to engage in it, can be harmed by it.

Stepping into the ring of rhetoric every day, is not good for you. Especially if you're forced to do so just to be granted validation on your basic right to exist. That there's a place to go in-between battles to recover, is a good thing.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Safe spaces are not a bad thing. Echo chambers are only echo chambers if the people inside them don’t move in and out as needed. Which at least I do, do. Discussion is good, but it cannot be mandatory, as those who cannot, do not want to, or are not ready to engage in it, can be harmed by it.

Yes, I agree.

If a Blahj user can't move into an echo chamber (Blahj communities) and out of the echo chamber (the rest of the fediverse) then Blahj is, by this definition, an echo chamber. A single person choosing to remove the option from every Blahj user to leave the echo chamber would be bad.

An example of such a behavior would be if the single person defederated another instance from Blahj, preventing the Blahj users from being able to choose to access the external discussion.

A safe space would be, for example, a Blahj community on a Blahj server. This is a good thing, because it gives people the ability to access a safe space. It becomes a bad thing when that safe space is ran by people who want to isolate their users from the greater social media landscape 'for their protection'.

Users can choose which communities they subscribe to. Blahj users could choose to avoid Feddit.uk or they could choose to read Feddit.uk. Now they can't.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Have you heard about this one weird trick, called having more than one account?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Just because there's a workaround doesn't make it not a problem.

It's like the Right in the US saying 'Well if you don't want to be deported, you can just leave', while technically true... it doesn't mean that the administration is doing things which are morally defensible.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

People who benefit from having an account on blahaj, aren't going to use that same account to go "out in the world" to fight their fight.

Especially because the worst among the kind of people they deal with, are the type to send death threats to their DMs. If another instance fails to moderate that, or any lesser type of attack, defederation is the only recourse.

Blahaj is being run exactly the way it should be, to maintain its goals.

That the admin reaches out to other admins and mods, is simply a courtesy, aimed to maintain as much federation as possible without compromising the mission.

And before you suggest that blahaj should simply moderate the entire fediverse from their end, that is not actionable advice. Blahaj needs to maintain a moderation surface area that they can actually keep up with, and hence they have to rely on the instances they federate with to match their standards, where applicable.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

The kind of people you're talking about are not going to be affected by Blahj defederating feddit.uk. If a person is looking to commit harassment then they're going to make a new account and no amount of defederation will prevent this (unless Blahj, like Beehaw, goes private) because it is trivial to make an accounts on non-blocked instances.

They don't need to moderate the entire fediverse, they only need to moderate their communities.

In this situation, what is the goal here? What purpose is served, from the point of view of a Blahj users if another user, who isn't a Blahj user and isn't commenting in Blahj communities is banned from a non-Blahj instance? Users can already block instances, communities and individuals on their own. Users can already choose to only see local Blahj communities if they want to ensure that they're in a safe space and the Blahj admins have full control over the Blahj communities.

The Blahj admin's opinion doesn't matter when the topic is a non-blahj user, in a non-blahj community. They're certainly free to block whoever they want, or not; and federate with who they want to or not.

But, in the context of "Are they power tripping or not", choosing to defederate an instance simply because an admin brushed them off puts it squarely in the "power tripping" pile. It wasn't that feddit.uk was suddenly the source of a lot of transphobic attacks, or that they allow bigotry... it was that feddit.uk has different moderation practices then Blahj and refused to change them. It's petty and power tripping.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

I'm not going to continue paraphrasing things I've already said until you get it.

You are under several misconceptions about what is good for the users of blahaj and the fediverse at large.

Blahaj would absolutely go private given no other option, but for now they are able to work with most of the mods and admins of the fediverse, so they don't need to. They can have their cake, and eat at least some of it, too.

For blahaj to ask other instances "hey, will you uphold this standard, if not, we don't have the bandwidth to be doing it for you on our end, so if you aren't, we need to know so we can make a decision on whether to federate" is not a fucking power trip.

It's a completely reasonable moderation practice, and they aren't interested in letting things get out of hand before they cut a given line. What's wrong with that?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

You moderate a community, you have to know that if a user is being disruptive you don't need the admins of their instance in order to secure your community from their disruption.

There is zero reason to involve the admin of another instance unless you need to handle things like networking or technical issues (like a spam attack coming from an instance).

For blahaj to ask other instances “hey, will you uphold this standard, if not, we don’t have the bandwidth to be doing it for you on our end, so if you aren’t, we need to know so we can make a decision on whether to federate” is not a fucking power trip.

Blahj moderators do not need to moderate non-Blahj instances. There is no bandwidth issue. The Blahj team only needs to moderate the Blahj community.

The user in question wasn't posting in a Blahj community and so it doesn't affect Blahj users unless they choose to go into Feddit.uk communities.

That's how the federated social media system works.

A user can choose to never see anything but local communities. If a user chooses to visit non-Blahj communities then they read what is in that community, based on that community's rules. A user can block any disturbing user, community or instances. The user gets to choose these things for themselves.

Users can moderate their feeds. Moderators can moderate their communities.

None of this requires a server admin. Defederation is an admin function, not a moderation function.

What the admin has done is to tell Blahj users that they can no longer read the communities that they've chosen to subscribe to and the communities on Feddit.uk are now deprived of their members (who choose to subscribe and participate) from the Blahj instance.

It doesn't serve anybody's interests except for the instance administrator. The administrator who said that they did it because they asked another instance to ban a user and change their instance rules and the Feddit.uk admins refused. This is entirely an issue between administrators that one administrator has chosen to escalate.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

This one makes the least sense so far.

Users can moderate their feeds.

That, right there, is the issue.

You don't seem to understand, that they shouldn't have to. Curate? Yes. Moderate? Absolutely not.

Moderation is just like discussion. I quote your agreement with my earlier argument:

Safe spaces are not a bad thing. Echo chambers are only echo chambers if the people inside them don’t move in and out as needed. Which at least I do, do. Discussion is good, but it cannot be mandatory, as those who cannot, do not want to, or are not ready to engage in it, can be harmed by it.

Yes, I agree.

Moderation is work done by the few to protect the many. If every one of us has to block every instance, user, or community, individually, that means we all get to see all of them. And thereby, be hurt by them.

Such personal moderation cannot be mandatory, as those who cannot, do not want to, or are not ready to engage in it, can be harmed by it.

None of this requires a server admin. Defederation is an admin function, not a moderation function.

That is a personal preference. Defederation along with community purging, hiding, and user bans are all moderation tools. Which ones are used and how extensively, is something each admin and mod can decide for themselves. In the same way, each user can decide for themselves how they want them to be used, and choose an instance accordingly.

That you, personally, want to make each such decision for yourself, is an exceedingly personal preference. One that any user on blahaj that shares it, is free to adhere to by signing up for an account on an instance that aligns with that preference.

You are assuming the users of blahaj ALL share it with you, in a thread full of people telling you, they do not.

You are literally trying to do the thing you are accusing blahaj of, applying a fediverse-wide standard that cannot be violated by anyone. In your case, it is that there are things admins should not decide over, for their users.

What, exactly, is preventing instances who differ on the matter from co-existing?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

You don’t seem to understand, that they shouldn’t have to. Curate? Yes. Moderate? No.

Yes, semantics.

Users choose to Curate which communities they go into. They do this with full access to the rules of the community and the ability to instantly opt out of that community or instance should it become distasteful to them. Moderation of those communities is up to the owner of the community and is operated under the rules of the instance admins. Users choose to read and subscribe to these communities and if they're not happy with the moderation then they can choose to curate those communities out of their feed.

What, exactly, is preventing instances who differ on the matter from co-existing?

Administrators who defederate over differences in moderation choices rather than moderate their own communities and let their users choose what communities they want to see.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Yes, semantics.

Literally, no. Why would you pull that card then go on to write a paragraph that demonstrates your understanding of the distinction?

Administrators who defederate over differences in moderation choices rather than moderate their own communities and let their users choose what communities they want to see.

Again, that you want to choose with such granularity is a personal preference, one you can engage in by signing up on any number of aligned instances.

How, exactly, is your experience impacted by the way blahaj runs things? Except for your deluded perception that they bully other admins and mods into maintaining their standards in order to not be defederated?

Blahaj federates with corners of the fediverse they are confident are safe, and do not, when they aren't. It couldn't be any simpler.

If sopuli didn't defederate instances that are primarily for porn, I could not browse "all" in order to engage in community discovery without seeing a bunch of it. You keep trying pull a "then they should stay on local communities" card but that is completely insane. Why should moderation confine itself to local content?

The whole beauty of federation is that several standards and preferences can interleave and overlay, and each user can navigate to a place in the fediverse where the workload of moderation according to their preferences, has already been done.

Your argument against the way blahaj does things, is an argument against the diversity in the range of such places. You think each user should choose, because that is what you want to do, and so you argue against their ability to choose that someone choose for them.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Using logical fallacies to discredit the other person is not something done in good faith.

I agree, and yet:

Ah yes, the evergreen 'If you disagree, I'm going to imply that you're transphobic/against trans people' argument.

Boiled down, what you're saying here is that I'm trying to tell someone they are wrong about something, and that it relates to transphobia.

But you've framed it such that because it is about transphobia, I can't possibly have a point. Or that the mention of transphobia, is meant to guilt trip you into agreeing with something that doesn't hold water. But that's just an excuse to bring out an emotional retort, when there isn't a logical one.

Paraphrasing what someone is saying until it feels like nothing but a personal attack, is not something you do in good faith. What you should be doing, is separating out any logic and emotion in what someone is telling you. Discarding or responding to one or the other, or both, as applicable. You got some hateful, purely emotional responses that you can and should dismiss, by mine wasn't one of them.

Just because someone is trying to inform you of an issue in your behaviour or views, does not allow you to dismiss them out of hand. Unless you are perfect, there is a chance they have a point.

Telling someone they engage in a behaviour, or hold an opinion, that is transphobic, is never pleasant. But that the person themselves doesn't intend to discriminate, does not make the argument itself evaporate. And that some are too militant to present even a shred of logic, doesn't mean none of the people who confront you on the same subject have a point.

In fact, by engaging in this fallacy, you failed to follow another piece of your own advice.

A conversation requires a good faith effort to understand the other side.

You were so sure this part wasn't happening, you completely failed to start off doing it yourself.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Talking about IRL. Yeah, I see your point. But online, I can't.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

What's the distinction?

Is this "online" discussion were having less real than the one we might have face to face?

Moderation isn't about convincing people presenting harmful views, to change their minds.

It's about protecting people.

And we aren't talking about physical harm. Except in the sense that mental harm can eventually become physical harm.

If you just jump in to argue with the offender, that does absolutely nothing to prevent your users from being exposed to it.

If I wanted to convince you that I genuinely wished you weren't alive, all I'd need is the written word. And if I threw a net wide enough, subtle enough, I'd catch some strays even if I didn't succeed with you specifically. (I do not want you dead, or wish you any kind of harm)

Do you genuinely believe such harm isn't possible? Or not worth preventing?

Every. Word. Counts.

If suicidal people can be saved through words, then they can also be killed by them.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 week ago

Usually when two people are fighting, if a third person comments against one of them, it's pretty safe to assume they're on the side of the guy they aren't commenting against.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 week ago

Sometimes being able to have discussions is a privilege. A lot of people just want to exist safely in a space without having to justify this or that. Blahaj seems to be such a space and there are other spaces for people to go if they do want debate and discussion

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I hope you fall into a pit of used syringes covered in shit. Actually, if you were standing next to such a pit, I would push you into it. Go join a Nazi instance if you're gonna talk like one.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Ah, I see you've taken the moral highground.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Stand among a people who get murdered and erased left and right and tell me if honor or morality matter

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Nothing says you're against murder and erasure like gleefully explaining how you would kill somebody.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I'm not against murder or erasure of fascist, homophobic, bigoted dipshits. I'm against the murder and erasure of vulnerable minorities who have historically been oppressed by the aforementioned bigoted dipshits. In fact, as an egoistic anarchist, I condone murder of fascists, homophobes, and bigoted dipshits. Bash back, motherfucker!

Also, odd choice to defend some dude JAQing off about if transgender people have the right to exist in their own space free of harassment.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Oh yeah, well you're a Nazi.

Ah.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago

Oh yes, very keen of you.

You scrubbed through my post history and found my only post (which I was hiding by mentioning it in my comment in this very thread). Another example of the Blahj admins using 'transphobic' like Israel uses 'antisemetic', as a cudgel against everyone not towing the party line.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago

Hey, how about you go swallow a hand grenade after pulling the pin?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Okay, how can you get more to join your side. If you don’t have discussions with other people? You can’t. Have fun in your echo chamber.

I am actually on your side with respect to full on defederation being too much in this case, but this is a comically naive take.

There are many situations were "debate club" is not an efficient way forward.

It might be worth leaving your own regional echo chamber and getting more real world experience.

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