this post was submitted on 14 Jul 2025
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[–] [email protected] 68 points 4 days ago (2 children)

So in Seattle last week there was a man who accidentally shot himself in the leg while driving his car. He called 911 because he obviously needed help, but tried to tell cops that he was shot by a stranger while driving. They asked why there were no entry holes in his car, and I think he went to jail for being a dumbass.

Anyway, how do we know JFK didn't accidentally shoot himself and then try to cover it up because he was so embarrassed.

[–] [email protected] 47 points 4 days ago (2 children)

My theory is that one of his security details turned around to ask him a question and accidentally shot him in the face like Marvin in pulp fiction

[–] [email protected] 21 points 4 days ago

There is actually a theory that he was shot by accident by a secret service agent trying to return fire.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 4 days ago (1 children)

lol this is the best theory I’ve ever heard. Except they would have shot him like three times by accident. Then they go to Nixon’s house where he is complaining about his wife’s coffee.

I would pay to see that movie.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago

Did you notice a sign in front of my house that said dead president storage?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Because he was in a convertible. Obviously the bullet(s?) could have come from outside of the car. Checkmate Zapruder.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (1 children)

He froze the back of his head off from those cool southeasterly winds

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Comrade, this was a sunny day in Texas.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)