Mental Health
Welcome
This is a safe place to discuss, vent, support, and share information about mental health, illness, and wellness.
Thank you for being here. We appreciate who you are today. Please show respect and empathy when making or replying to posts.
If you need someone to talk to, @[email protected] has kindly given his signal username to talk to: TherapyGary13.12
Rules
The rules for posting and commenting, besides the rules defined here for lemmy.world, are as follows:
- No promoting paid services/products.
- Be kind and civil. No bigotry/prejudice either.
- No victim blaming. Nor giving incredibly simplistic solutions (i.e. You have ADHD? Just focus easier.)
- No encouraging suicide, no matter what. This includes telling someone to commit homicide as "dragging them down with you".
- Suicide note posts will be removed, and you will be reached out to in private.
- If you would like advice, mention the country you are in. (We will not assume the US as the default.)
If BRIEF mention of these topics is an important part of your post, please flag your post as NSFW and include a (trigger warning: suicide, self-harm, death, etc.)in the title so that other readers who may feel triggered can avoid it. Please also include a trigger warning on all comments mentioning these topics in a post that was not already tagged as such.
Partner Communities
To partner with our community and be included here, you are free to message the current moderators or comment on our pinned post.
Becoming a Mod
Some moderators are mental health professionals and some are not. All are carefully selected by the moderation team and will be actively monitoring posts and comments. If you are interested in joining the team, you can send a message to @[email protected].
view the rest of the comments
Do they even lift, bro?
But seriously these guys need to just pay attention to women if that's what they want the muscles about. Women are not out there just drooling over muscles all the time, they mostly want a generally fit body, maybe abs and stuff. Big muscly bodybuilders are probably going to attract more gays than women.
This was a discussion about "muscle dysmorphia" rather than a general dating strategy thing so I'm only pointing out physical stuff. I'm not here to help youngsters with their dating life but I thought it would be helpful for any of them to know that they don't need to be a Hans & Franz muscleman to get dates.
ATTENTION!! This kid speaks for all women!
You can ignore my advice at your own risk, but I know what I'm talking about with women. If there were any on here they would probably chime in to agree that big muscles are not an important feature for a man to look good.
You have no idea what you're talking about because you're generalizing what another person finds attractive.
You have no idea what I know about and what experiences I've had, because if you were on my level you would recognize the truth that I shared. Sorry about your luck there.
One thing I know for certain is that you're abrasive.
Only when people are jerks to me first.
I've seen a meme that included Henry Cavill as the Witcher as someone who is not muscular, so the unrealistic expectation is there.
For example, compare these two cover photos of Hugh Jackman. The one for women is not the one with a shirtless man and rippling muscles
That comment is incredibly high on the Sapho and her Friend scale.
Of course hypermuscular comic book characters and a ripped Hugh Jackman aren't just male power fantasies. They're also men being objectified for men.
How can someone be so oblivious about how blatantly homoerotic comics and some of these 'fitness' magazines are?
Different people have different tastes. I know people both men and women who have learned not to be into the bodybuilder physique because while they think it looks good they don’t like dating people who live the lifestyle it requires. They also complain about how it isn’t as nice to cuddle. Now, gay/bi men are more likely to be into living that lifestyle than straight/bi women.
But from what I’ve heard it’s a body type largely idealized not in a sexual way, but in a self insert way. It looks powerful, and has become a cultural ideal. In part because it’s the optimization of the appearance of strength.
Most people want someone reasonably attractive that can share their lifestyle to a reasonable degree. Beyond that, social skills and improving grooming will improve your chances far more than more time in the gym unless you enjoy it want want a partner who’s into exercise too.