this post was submitted on 05 Oct 2024
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[–] [email protected] 197 points 7 months ago (6 children)

You phone shouldn't make any sound whatsoever when you're in public period.

[–] [email protected] 86 points 7 months ago (3 children)

It can ring and give notifications, as long as they aren't set to something obnoxious.

[–] [email protected] 87 points 7 months ago (3 children)

It becomes obnoxious no matter what it is when they're having a text conversation with someone and it's going off constantly

[–] [email protected] 35 points 7 months ago (4 children)

I'm pretty old but do you know the Woody Woodpecker laugh? I used to work with a girl back before smartphones that had that as her text notification. It was the whole thing which takes like five seconds so sometimes it was just that fucking sound almost non-stop. Here it is, cursed fucking creation.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 7 months ago

That sounds like something they would do to prisoners in Guantanamo.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago

I can't imagine the ptsd you have

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago

It's kind of amazing that I haven't really thought about Woody Woodpecker since watching the cartoons as a kid and the animation doesn't look familiar at all other than yeah that's the right colors, but I could hear the laugh in my head immediately on seeing the name, without having to play the audio.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

i couldn't even make it through the 8 second video. i cant begin to imagine what you must have gone through. my heart goes out to you

[–] [email protected] 20 points 7 months ago (1 children)

For me, if I’m actually having a conversation in public, I’ll silence my phone.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Right, but they were suggesting it should be silenced at all times, by default, even for the very first notification.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 7 months ago (2 children)

Put your phone on vibrate, you'll survive.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago (1 children)

In the before time, the long long ago, people didn't have a portable social media machine

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago

I meant I don’t think I’ll put it on silent. I barely use social media outside of Lemmy

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago (2 children)

That's what my phone is set at 24/7, the only time it makes a noise from the speakers is when the alarm goes off in the morning.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

I have my phone set so it sets itself to vibrate when it disconnects from my home WiFi. It turns the notification sounds back up when it reconnects. I've never had to worry about it again.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

That's the way

[–] [email protected] 11 points 7 months ago

Well they should silence it at that point because obviously they're paying enough attention to it and expecting responses, so they should be waiting for the vibrate if not looking at it directly.

But people don't need to have their phone silenced at all times while in public, they just need to be attentive enough to answer and silence it. I frequently don't even feel the vibration.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Unprompted, I will tell you the most obnoxious ring tone I have ever heard. It was on the subway and a voice was suddenly loudly proclaiming: "Warning! Warning! The owner of this phone is a self-confessed binge drinker" until some douchebag picked up the call.

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago

It's probably obnoxious in real life but I really wanna do the ZZ Top ringtone from Bad Monkey

[–] [email protected] 17 points 7 months ago (2 children)

The worst part is that it's just normalized enough that you can't really call it out.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 7 months ago (2 children)

It's normalized because it's not a serious problem, it's a minor, and extremely temporary annoyance the vast majority of the time.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

It's incredibly obnoxious and there's never a good reason for it.

Headphones are dirt cheap. Use them in public. No one has ever wanted to hear your bullshit.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago

Clearly you've never spent an hour+ on a bus with someone watching TikTok on a fucking Bluetooth speaker.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

that has not stopped me from calling it out. in my experience, most people seem to be unaware that it bothers other people (or at least they claim to be unaware).

that said, a decent number of them are unwilling to change their behavior after being told that it does bother people.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (6 children)

If someone told me to silence my phone in public they would get laughed at. And if you persist I'll tell you to call the cops, who will then proceed to laugh at you.

Theatres, yeah, they shouldn't even vibrate.

Edit: you're prefences are noted and ignored. People have been loud in public since there has been public. Get over yourselves.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 7 months ago

Presumably, for such a complaint, the cops wouldn't even bother to come to laugh at you unless they were very very bored. This is probably true in both circumstances you described. Also, I can't speak for others, but unless detained I wouldn't stick around most public locations long enough for someone to complain about a notification from my phone. Even if a call is received and must be answered, it seems appropriate to accept the call and leave the immediate shared area if possible. Obviously, in such circumstances as a moving bus, quickly leaving isn't really feasible.

However, I partially agree with the person to whom you responded. Your phone shouldn't make any media based sound (videos, music) in public. I also mostly agree with what I think you're saying: in most circumstances, notification sounds are inoffensive. Movies are not the only exception to this but definitely are one. Laughing in the face of someone who requests quiet in a public shared area seems rude, though, and might escalate the situation.

To elaborate, recently I went to see a dental surgeon. As I approached the waiting area, my immediate thought was to set my phone to vibrate. Once I entered, however, I realized that not only was there a TV in the space; also there was an elderly couple watching TV on their phones. Not only were they doing so, not only were they watching something different from what was on the TV, not only were they watching their media at BLARING volume, but they were also watching vastly different content. In this circumstance, notifications could be - reluctantly - forgiven, but their blasting and conflicting media made it very difficult to concentrate on filling out my paperwork.

I'm too much of a wimp to have approached them, but in that circumstance I think it would have been appropriate to ask them to silence their media and would have only required a vague awareness of the existence of others for them to have done so without prompting.

Though the cops, if they came, would likely still have just laughed.

An aside: as soon as the presumed wife left the waiting area, the likely husband shut off his media. I don't know what that means, but wanted to mention it.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Call the cops?

Yea you're obviously a child. I mean literally based on that response.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

How am I a child? Dude makes up a rule and I'm supposed to follow it? Really?

It's not a law, and telling someone to call the cops os pointing out the absurdity of the demand.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago (5 children)

I wouldn’t call the cops. I’d just fling it into the ocean. Who would call the cops for you then? You can’t. You have no phone.

See? We all make decisions every second to be or not to be jerks. You’re not special.

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago
[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago (1 children)

It interferes with public emergency announcements so there should be some clear enough airspace for it.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago (1 children)

What if, what if, what if. The world is noisy.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago (4 children)

That’s just an excuse to be an asshole. Not to consider. This is how sociopaths reason.

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Nobody should even speak in public! Or breathe my air!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago (1 children)

A narcissistic sociopath is someone who exhibits traits of both narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) and antisocial personality disorder (ASPD). They may have an exaggerated sense of self-importance, a lack of regard for others, and a tendency to manipulate others to get what they want

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago (1 children)

They might be a literal child, as implied by their name.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago (1 children)

I was making fun of this entire concept. If talking in public is allowed, it implies that everyone is comfortable with a person emitting a certain amount of noise. What form that noise takes is idiotic to divvy up and bitch about.

Explain to me how if you're annoyed by music playing, why is that any more valid than someone else being mad at talking? Or someone else for whistling? Singing? Phone ringing? Vibrating? Where are your arbitrary lines?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago (1 children)

You can't be serious. Or you don't spend a lot of time in public.

Most people's conversations in public are fairly quiet. People often do get annoyed of people are having a screaming or otherwise disruptive conversation on the subway. Most humans don't find a quiet conversation that distracting though. Hearing half a conversation annoys most people- I think it's because the brain keeps trying to figure out what's happening.

https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/hearing-just-one-half-of-a-conversation-is-really-really-annoying-2657804/

It's not really """arbitrary lines""". The shared theme is "don't distract other people in public". Whistling fails this check. So does singing. As does a phone alarm going off. But also like most things that annoy or tolerate are arbitrary.

This is especially true if you need to hear announcements like what stop this is or that this train is going express.

Anyway, my current thinking is you're doing some sort of "bit" as a selfish child, or you just don't spend a lot of time in public.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (4 children)

So you would like legislation passed to outlaw street performers? If I'm a child for asking these questions, what does that make you, an angry old man yelling at kids? Maybe I'm just not as bothered by people living there lives as you are. I expect noise in public.

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

100%. Public areas need enough clear airspace for emergency announcements as it puts everyone in danger.

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