"I find the most erotic part of a woman is the boobies."
this post was submitted on 25 Jun 2024
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If i said you have a nice body would you take off your clothes and do a little dance?
"I am no longer infected!"
Bouncy bouncy
If you throw some money at me I would
Remember Kif: the fastest way to a woman's bed is through her parents. Have sex with them and you're in.
Well at least there's something we can all agree on.
Relevant last place comic:
Idk why but censoring R*ddit is way funnier than it should be
Oh it's reddit? I thought it was censoring out a name of a planet.
Huh I thought it's a country name.
Given the image, I first thought it was a sci-fi planet.
It makes it funnier because it implies that earth women are a dead end for this gamer
I prefer Re***t
It’s the most ****it sentence over ever read
Maybe start by not referring to them as ‘females’ or talking about ‘luring’ them to your room
He calls it his lair.
*dungeon
**fungeon
“Plus Size Gamer”
Dude, we’re fat or even obese.
morbidly sexy
Sounds like a great band name
rubenesque gamer
Diabetes Stranding
I heard that showing her how unfair it is that just because you are nice no one wants to sleep with you, is the best way to make her sleep with you out of obvious obligation to your nice personality and unjust fate
Also in this context being weird and shy counts as nice. You don't actually have to make any effort!
And you simply must begin and end every sentence with uWu, obviously.
Well maybe they’ve gotten enough nice points they can turn them in for one sex?
Of course! They showered last week and everything!
I used to know one who would go for "here's $100", though that was many many years ago and I don't know if she still lives that kind of life. I haven't kept up with anyone from high-school, much less friends of friends.
"You should smile more. You'd be a lot prettier"
No clue, but I would start by not referring to them as females, just a hunch.
"Hi, I'm Gabe"
Han shot first
"$3 million/year, 1 night/week."
~150,000/night is a hefty cost.
To betray one's own heart in the interest of profit, such a cost is fair.
ever been married?
You don't have to say anything, just show them the sweet skills you've developed while studying the blade.
John Madden. Football.
"plus sized"
There's one in the Austin Powers movies with a funny scottish accent.
I don't think he's not a gamer tho. "Dead sexy" funny guy nonetheless.
I believe his pick up line was: "Listen missy, do you fancy another go? Because once you've had fat you never go back."
He had other lines the ladies love like:
"First things first. Where’s your shitter?! I’ve got a turtle head poking out!"
Fat Bastard?
This is semi unrelated, but I think still somewhat fitting. There's this one guy in our festival group that sometimes is away, no one knows where he's at but chances are high, he's fucking someone. He's that kind of guy, that ladies fall for when he drops lines like "hi, I'm (redacted) and how do your pants open?"
If I hadn't seen it, I wouldn't believe it.
Well, actually...
The prequels were better