this post was submitted on 27 Nov 2024
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me_irl

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[–] [email protected] 24 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Ahh yes the old excuse of "I can't come, the ghost of Hitler is having a nervous breakdown."

I need to be there for my homie.

...wait

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 months ago

Better then Get this: My nephew gave me syphilis.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 5 months ago (2 children)

The whole HS marching band, eh?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago

All of it. Including the trombone.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

Change it to a college marching band and I'd sign up for that course of antibiotics

[–] [email protected] 13 points 5 months ago

Sorry I can't come, a professional hockey team gave me syphilis.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 months ago
[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 months ago

This is going to sound like an excuse, but my tinder date found my box of human teeth.....now she wants to show me hers.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 months ago

I can't go because Dan Rather gave me syphilis

sounds about right

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 months ago

Is MAD magazine back?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

I can't go because the Pope posted my nudes on Instagram. Plus a high school marching band died in front of me, but whatevs. They were crap 🤷

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

Many of these sound pretty believable if you go with the "my Tinder date" option.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

What flag is this?

[–] LostWanderer 1 points 5 months ago

ROFL I would use these only if I were being particularly cheeky to someone that I didn't like.