this post was submitted on 20 Apr 2025
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Alt text:  
A simple infographic with cute white text on a pale pink background which reads:  
How to Level at Veganism  
Lvl 1* - No animal products in diet or clothing  
Lvl 2 - Talks kindly to plants before harvesting  
Lvl 3 - Politely negotiates w/ insects to relocate  
Lvl 4 - Avoids making noise to disturb animals  
Lvl 5 - Avoids breathing out CO2 near animals
Lvl 6 - Does not step on animal shadows  
Lvl 7 - Travels exclusively by stilts  
Lvl 8 - Never eats anything blown on by wind  
Lvl 9 - Only eats what has never been observed   
Lvl 10 - Refuses to consume anything that may have existed in the past or future  
*Honorable mention; not true veganism
top 48 comments
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[–] [email protected] 66 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

Look at them stupid vegans, trying to not harm animals and our planet πŸ˜‚

Tap for spoiler/s

I’m not vegan, but vegans are right, even if you find them annoying. The meat and & dairy industry is causing unimaginable suffering to millions of animals every day, while wasting the limited resources of our planet. The world would be a much better place if we consumed less or no animal products.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I've been vegan for 9 years lol

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago

I should really read post titles

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

I am convinced that vegans today will be like we look at abolitionists like Alexander Hamilton back during the 18th century. People will be horrified that we treated animals so abysmally for convenience, and some will say it was a normal and accepted practice, and people didn't realize how horrible it was, and others will point to the vegans of today.

Thoughts like those make me a little more understanding of people like George Washington. He recognized it was bad, tried to mitigate it, but still perpetuated the practice. Just like I switched to Impossible Beef and chicken, do my best to buy local family eggs, but buy cheese and milk and ice cream from big name companies like Tillamook and Ben & Jerry's.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago

Yes, I also think we will look back on meat eating in 50-100 years like we look back at slavery now

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

vegans today will be like we look at abolitionists like Alexander Hamilton back during the 18th century

Alexander Hamilton very deliberately and strategically married into a family of wealthy New York slave owners, then proceeded to cut deals with Virginia slave owners in order to enrich his northern friends through a publicly chartered bank that profited off of increased slave traffic and slave territory expansion.

To call Alexander Hamilton an abolitionist is about as rational as calling Donald Trump a feminist.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

Also factory farming is responsible for i think 10% of the total greenhouse gas emissions yearly

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Vegans continue to exist, to eat delicious food, and to mention their diet to other people.

I find this unforgivable.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

We should do one for regular diets where it goes from ignorantly contributing to animal suffering to torturing them yourself, then dying of diabetes and colon cancer.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

No no, that would hurt the feelings of the man-children that get triggered by vegans existing. They're too sensitive, they can't take it, it would be an act of cruelty towards animals that have no personal agency, which we all know is something vegans can't condone.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

How dare some people make an obviously correct moral decision that highlights my own inadequacies?

Seriously though, I’m not even slightly vegan. I’m just also not a total fucking moron.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago

Same boat. I'm not vegan, and I'll probably never be. I could genuinely see myself going lacto ovo, but honestly, that wouldn't be so hard for me if I only cook for myself. But, like, it is clearly the correct moral decision, and anyone arguing that is either misinformed or lying to themselves

[–] [email protected] 22 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

level 11: wipes out all animal life to protect animals from ever doing harm to other animals

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 weeks ago

Vegan antinatalist utilitarianism ftw

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

At what level do they talk incessantly about their veganism?

[–] [email protected] 22 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

β€œI’m going to buy vegan ice cream”

β€œWe get it, you’re vegan”

β€”-

β€œI’m going to buy ice cream”

β€œI thought you were vegan?”

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

Yeah, that's the level when you keep telling people "I'm really thinking about going vegan. I'm pretty sure I'm gonna do it"

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Lvl 1* - No animal products in diet or clothing

*Honorable mention; not true veganism

Huh?

[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

If you're not talking nicely to the plants, you're not a vegan in spirit.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

No, no, you must kiss every plant before eating it.

vegan btw

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I kiss it while I'm eating it, does that count?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

Lol I forgot I made my comment and was real confused at first why I received this message in my inbox.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

This is actually the case, according to some vegan YouTuber. From what I understand (and according to these people) veganism is about harm reduction, so they shouldn't consume anything produced by exploitation or animal (including human) suffering.

Not consuming animal product should be technically "plant-based" or "vegan diet".

I do applaud their effort, and feel they are certainly stepping towards the right direction, but it would probably take a long time for society to accept this definition.

On the other hand, I feel it is fine to have different definitions for the same word. I think even among the vegan community, there must be many definitions of "animal suffering". I feel it is okay as long as we are doing the best we can do.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

Yeah, I applaud the effort of people trying to improve themselves, but saying something you don't approve of doesn't count as vegan just sounds like gatekeeping.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Yo, totally incorrect.

Level 5 vegans dont eat anything that casts a shadow.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago

What a great episode

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

Ever since HowToBasic's vegan recipes taught me how to cook good vegan meals, I've slowly been leveling up on this chart. My aim is to reach level 5 this year.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

HowToBasic videos that don't feature eggs? That sounds weird.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

Here's a really good vegan lasagna recipe I followed as an example, hope you like it :)

https://youtu.be/_xrgvJ7LNhk

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

That... Actually looks delicious. I'm going to give it a try.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

you could throw whole lettuce violently for same affect

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

And I bet at none of these levels is it wrong to kill mosquitos.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

There’s an argument that it’s β€œvegan” to eat lionfish if one lives in say, Florida, because they’re an invasive species extremely disruptive to the environment. Killing them is a good thing and the fact that most things on US coasts won’t eat them is part of why we have the problem anyway.

Even if you go full negative utilitarian to the point where you are concerned with wild animal suffering, killing lionfish is good.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

veganism, as defined by the vegan society, which was founded by the folks who invented the term.... opposes exploitation and cruelty. if you can find a way to kill em without being cruel, I think you are good.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Being near-instantly crushed is one of the least cruel deaths i could imagine. Close to being instantly vaporized

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Writing this comment as a reminder to myself that the humanest possible execution method for billionaires is βˆ†P incidents. We should really resume loading them onto improvised submarines.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

Executing billionares is vegan friendly, too

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Veganism? Fantastic.

Vegans? Mostly assholes.

Downvote if you agree.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

When I was vegan, a lot of people seemed personally offended by my choices. I know there are preachy vegans, but if you really want to be preached at, you’ll get it by being vegan at any kind of food gathering.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

That's also true for being vegetarian. It's bonkers. But vegetarians don't lecture other vegetarians like vegans do.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

Upvote for disagree

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

TIL veganism is Jainism.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

This is basically the plot of The Vegetarian by Han Kang

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

This reminds me of some Zizzian shit

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

By level 5 you gotta be immortal to pass.