this post was submitted on 21 Nov 2023
351 points (100.0% liked)

Funny: Home of the Haha

7372 readers
28 users here now

Welcome to /c/funny, a place for all your humorous and amusing content.

Looking for mods! Send an application to Stamets!

Our Rules:

  1. Keep it civil. We're all people here. Be respectful to one another.

  2. No sexism, racism, homophobia, transphobia or any other flavor of bigotry. I should not need to explain this one.

  3. Try not to repost anything posted within the past month. Beyond that, go for it. Not everyone is on every site all the time.


Other Communities:

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
all 34 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 41 points 2 years ago (3 children)

Sharks never went to church either, and they’ve survived all five of the extinction events.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 2 years ago (2 children)

They do go to church actually. All surviving species do. You were just so absorbed in your sinful activities that you never took the time to learn more about them.

[–] abeojeht 7 points 2 years ago

He died for their fins

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago (1 children)

The First United Church of Chomp

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago

The Eucharist is surfer blood and sea biscuits.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 years ago (1 children)

The ocean is god's blindspot.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Because the ocean has other gods.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago
[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

Also dinosaurs were around for about 160 million years .... our species ancestors have only been around for about two million and the ones that even remotely look and act like us have only been around for about 50,000 years.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 2 years ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 years ago

A man of the claw!

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 years ago (1 children)

This is one of those so bad its good movies

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 years ago

And it has ninjas!

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 years ago

Neither do ants. They are in sects

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 years ago (1 children)

How do we know? Dinos ruled the Earth for 165 million years. Humans have only been around for 300,000 years. For all we know, Dinos might have even built spaceships and left the planet to colonize other star systems in the Delta Quadrant.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago

Sanctuary of the holy space salamander

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 years ago

They ate, fucked, and generally dominated the planet for millions of years until they were taken out by an external factor.

How's humanity doing for comparison? We have cell phones, religion, racisim, mysogony, wars, and microwavable bacon. Oh, and we'll probably end up destroying ourselves because we choose to live where its either too hot or too cold.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Dinosaurs never gave me twenty dollars, neither, and see what happened to 'em. That's not a threat, it's just a fact.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

I did hear of one that asked to borrow about tree fiddy.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Therapods live! We call them birds. Stay out of church and you might fly like an angel some day 👍

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Is this why people insist birds aren't real?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago

Birds Aren’t Real? How a Conspiracy Takes Flight | Peter McIndoe | TED
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3VEkzweBJPM

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago

Or be as mysterious as Horseshoe crab and coelacanth👌

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago (3 children)

Five services! Is that normal? I remember one, sometimes two, when I was a kid going to church.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago

I thought two was normal. A morning and afternoon service.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago

Look... do you want the asteroid to come back?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago

Where I live (France countryside) there's only one priest for the 4 nearest towns ; he's rotating churches like 2 on Saturday then 2 on Sunday.

Guess on weekdays he's scratching his balls or ~~something~~ someone else's.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago (1 children)

How the fuck do they know? Maybe they did!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago

Maybe they did go to church, but I bet it was the wrong one.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago

Those damned dinos.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago

I thought Jesus rode on them?