this post was submitted on 04 Jun 2025
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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.
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What stats go down? Afaik the only thing being dirty really does other than cover you in blood is make you smell, which can give away your position to enemies. But just getting dirty doesn't make you smell, you have to crawl through something smelly and your stench will be indicated by flies buzzing around you (and Ocelot telling you that you stink). The only way I've ever been stinky is by hiding in a dumpster for a bit.
I haven’t played metal gear but in Skyrim stealth is a stat and it seems like this makes it go down
The Dragonborn: farts
The 3 Guards who phased in through the walls: "STOP, CRIMINAL SCUM!"
Nobody breaks wind on my watch!
"Must've been the wind."
Venom Snake: eats ration with beans
Venom Snake later on:
fart button unlocked
QTE to hold fart in while moving unlocked
Fuck, I'd totally fail that QTE right behind a guard on purpose
Sssssshhh! Don't tell the non-showering depressed shut-ins that!