Technology

Well, yeah. Isn't the whole point of these foolish office mandates to get people to quit? That way they can reduce their workforce without the cost and negative press of another round of layoffs.

Engineering is a skilled trade. We need our own union like every other skilled labor group.

Never quit in these situations, or they win.

Do the absolute fucking minimum you can, or even less so you piss off management, until they have to fire you, which they can't outright as after a certain number of years they have to give warnings and trainings first.

I don't know about everyone else, but if that were my boss, they'd be severely underestimating my capacity for petty behavior.

Yet another thinly veiled stealth lay-off by a technology company. Amazon’s cloud boss Matt "The Prat" Garman will indeed see some departures, as intended and desired. However, that first wave will be of their most talented, who feel confident they will land on their feet elsewhere, leaving those that simply cannot leave (yet) or those that will cozily under perform. When Amazon applies the inevitable followup reductions (subjectively based on their internal review process) to remove the latter, and the former buckle under the load or also leave, Amazon will be left with lower-middle talent at best.

The more I see of business "strategy" among this layer of "leadership", the more I'm convinced it is just a game of Jenga with talent, resources, infrastructure, security, quality, etc; pulling out as many pieces as possible in the drive for short term/sighted gains until a company collapses under its own dysfunctional "efficiency" and "success".

At the all-hands meeting, Garman said he’s been speaking with employees and “nine out of 10 people are actually quite excited by this change.”

Just imagine the conversation between the CEO of AWS and some random employee.

„What do you think about the return-to-office policy I propose, Cog #18574?“ „Great idea Mr. Garman sir, really smart move from your team. Incredible thinking and leadership from you Mr. Garman.“

continues to tell people that 9/10 employees he talks to are excited to return to office.

If the cloud is so great why can't you work remote?

I mean that's a relief. Could they not leave before?

I forsee an Amazon brain drain about to happen.

So admitting that it's constructive dismissal?

Don't worry. They will.

What if 37 000 employes leave amazon same day ?

I asked our CTO at a town hall if there were plans to improve the office my team got moved to because they moved us from the nice office to the city and the back to the previous area but a crappy office. Nope.

or they could fuck up key services with delayed code breaks before leaving. Programmers working for amazon should consider adding bullshit in the software and saying it was chatgpt

Go into the office and clog all the toilets.

This makes zero sense.. If you're a cloud company why can't employees be in the cloud

Another company that lays off it's talented people first, due to the meddling of a CEO where he has no business to.

Go into the office and waste every resource you can.

Plug in a fan + heater + aquarium + massage pad at your desk and leave everything on constantly even when you leave

Print every email and throw it in the trash.

Make coffee 50x a day and pour it down the sink

Flush a whole roll of TP every hour

Leave sinks on in the bathroom

Use entire tubs of soap to wash your hands

Turn on the microwave for hours at a time

Heat/cool office thermometer to force HVAC into overdrive

Open new browser windows until your computer crashes and repeat until the network goes down

Company wide meme emails that everyone participates in (team building) that crash servers and dominate inboxes

Pour sugar/crumbs everywhere so there's pest problems

Accept every phishing email

Put USB sticks found on the ground into your work computer

Open the door for strangers who want to get in the building without a badge

FORM A UNION

(nuclear option) introduce bedbugs to all your bosses offices

Funniest to me in this kind of debate is having my N+1 manage us from across the country, having two team members in another town, and somehow, my ass being at home 15km from the office makes any difference at all to the daily life of the team? It doesn't. My actual manager, the dude giving us our marching orders, doesn't care. Shit, our N+1 doesn't care either, since he's almost always remote himself!

Only people I've seen actually care seem to be HR, for whatever reason.

I don't even get how any company with several sites has anything to stand on. Makes no fucking sense.

BuT nO OnE WaNtS tO WoRk AnYmOrE1

Yeah, when you're having fun pissing off people, people are pissed off.

Who would have guessed?