this post was submitted on 24 Oct 2024
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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Anon thinks it's too late (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 6 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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[–] [email protected] 51 points 6 months ago

Aside from no friends, the rest of those things apply to a ton of 19 year olds. I don't think it's entirely Social Medias fault they have a weird expectation; even I had that as a teen and I heard my dad's generation did too.

I think it's mostly because people see movies where sex is commonplace in high school and losing your "V card" is a thing. The expectation to drive and work has also just been there since forever ago, but this current generation is even less likely to need to either. At least I know there are some non-chan places also pushing to get teens to understand those expectations aren't normal...

[–] [email protected] 40 points 6 months ago

giving actual life advice instead of an hero on live stream? the fuck happened to the chans?

[–] [email protected] 29 points 6 months ago (3 children)

I mean, I didn't have a partner till I was 20, and didn't have any friends (aside from partners) till I was almost 25.

It is super discouraging, after a lot of effort and crying, I finally have a pretty satisfying social life. It's not impossible.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

I pretty much re-invented myself around 20 and became a much better person for it and have had a pretty great life for the past fifteen years or so.

Ironically I had a lot of friends growing up but almost all of them turned into garbage monsters and I actually chose to be friend-free outside of my significant other not long after 20 and I really don't miss the friend experience. I do have a lot of casual acquaintances and my wife tells me I'm great in social situations but I just don't feel the need any more to expend energy on friends when I have my family and hobbies.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago

I pretty much re-invented myself around 20

Same. I was an absolutely horrible person. Was a total failure headed for jail. Finally realized it one day when my ex girlfriend sprayed me with mace. Was that day, face puffy and swollen, that I realized I had become bad guy that people live in fear of. I completely reinvented myself. Lost all of my friends, girlfriend, apartment, basically everything. Joined the military with $200 in my bank account and no debts unpaid. 10 years later and I have a successful career, good friends, wife, and expecting my first child in two months from now.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Yeah I started dating at 20. I’d always had friends but it for so much easier in my 20s to befriend people who treated me right.

Yeah it sucks. But also, anon’s advice is true. A huge step for me was getting the fuck over myself. Anon isn’t doomed but he has his work cut out for him

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

I don't know, I feel like anon's advice is misguided at the very least.

It assumes that OOP is more or less choosing to be this way, instead of struggling with issues outside their control, be it self-image issues, anxiety, depression, money or a myriad of other things. Depending on the particukar combination and severity, anon's situation may not change for a very long time, including forever.

I believe proper advice would focus on making them accept their situation. It's OK to have no friends or partner(s). They are not a necessity in order to live a meaningful life. Perhaps it won't be the most meaningful life possible but it is certainly possible to find meaning while feeling lonely. Though finding a job is somewhat important, especially if they live in countries without social welfare, they should focus on that for a bit.

I don't have any positive stories to share on how I overcame the issues anon is facing - considering I'm in my early 20s and have nearly all the same one's. But acceptance has helped me cope with my situation in a not unhealthy way and reduced some of the pain of loneliness and self-doubt.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

I didn't have mine until I was 23. That's when I had my first kiss too. I'm also a huge lesbian. It's a bummer for sure, but definitely was NOT the end of my life.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 6 months ago (2 children)

For “it’s too late for me” thinking, imagine what you’d think at {your_current_age}+10. For a teenager, work on developing a skill or talent, nothing else matters. Become independent and self reliant, and don’t be a jerk to others.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 6 months ago

If you're a teenager, just know that your stupidass brain won't be fully developed until your early/mid 20s. So just roll with it and stop imposing arbitrary deadlines on anything.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 6 months ago

"In 20 years from now, you'd give anything to be your age again with the opportunities you have available to you right now"

[–] [email protected] 24 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

when i was that age i too had trouble looking beyond the next few months

[–] [email protected] 21 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Legit though, a REAL bro would offer to let them give a blowjob. To the bro. Counts as sex! You suck my dick, you are officially not a virgin! Now, go out there and kiss someone with the jizz still lingering on your lips, you horny motherfucker :)

[–] [email protected] 14 points 6 months ago

There worse things than being a virgin.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 6 months ago

Lmao OP’s post reads like all of those posts on the self improvement subreddits

[–] [email protected] 13 points 6 months ago

First job and license at 21. First relationship, kiss and sex at 22.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I was still a virgin who never kissed a girl when I was 19, not for lack of trying (being an arrogant, shortsighted asshole certainly didn't help me score). Took me another year before I had sex for the first time.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

About the same for me. My solution was Accutane.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Maybe Anon is neurodivergent and doesn't even realise it.

I know people who are diagnosed later in life, which explains a lot when we were growing up.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago

Or anon is a lazy defeatist incel

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago

Poe's law