when you're on autopilot
- enjoy your meal
- you too!
this post was submitted on 20 Mar 2025
1116 points (100.0% liked)
Lemmy Shitpost
30099 readers
4989 users here now
Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.
Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!
Rules:
1. Be Respectful
Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.
Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.
...
2. No Illegal Content
Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.
That means:
-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals
-No CSA content or Revenge Porn
-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)
...
3. No Spam
Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.
-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.
-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.
-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers
-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.
...
4. No Porn/Explicit
Content-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.
-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.
...
5. No Enciting Harassment,
Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts-Do not Brigade other Communities
-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.
-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.
-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.
...
6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.
...
If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.
Also check out:
Partnered Communities:
1.Memes
10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)
Reach out to
All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
I once got a waitress on autopilot.
"Soup or salad?"
"Salad, please."
"And how would you like that cooked?"
"Uh... Raw?"
Should've said grilled lmao.
Boiled, please.
Medium rare for me, please.
- welcome!
- i’m doing well, thanks for asking.
- Happy birthday!
- Thanks, you too!
Well... Come!
(Things you can say to your dog but not your partner)
The trick I’ve found over years of people-Ing as the person working is to always end with a statement that can either be turned back with ”you too!” without being awkward, or warrants something other than an autopilot response.
Thanks for stopping in, have a great night
Enjoy your meal and if you need anything just let me/us know
Don’t forget to tell your friends about us, and have a great day
Etc.
That way it’s totally fine for them to autopilot the pleasantries and they won’t feel cringey after.
Thank you, I will.
Pulls up a chair and starts eating off your plate
I once did that one to the Boots employee at Heathrow Airport wishing me a nice trip 😄
It was a good thing too: I was having a very challenging day and laughing at myself for that really brightened my mood 😁
My dentist: got anything exciting coming up?
Me: Going to Bali in a couple of weeks, you?
Dentist: no, I’m not going to Bali.
😆
I once said to an employee, "Have a peaceful rest of your shift!" And he said, "You, too," and I didn't turn away fast enough and I watched his soul leave his body.
You legally work there now
Back in late 2023 or early 2024, I was doing chat support with one of the major US e-retailers due to a return & refund situation that I was honestly expecting to be a problem because that type of thing pretty much always is for some reason.
I ended up getting escalated to a higher tier tech named Muhammad who was miraculously able to quickly address the problem that his peers seemingly could not. At the end of our interaction, Muhammad thanked me for my patience and kindness, and replied something along the lines of "see you on the other side."
For some reason that random and otherwise meaningless expression has stuck with me ever since. Hardly a week goes by without me thinking about it at least once.
It was a reminder that our time here is limited. And while I'm not a big believer that there is another "side" like I assume someone named Muhammad believes, it was still somehow comforting and an important reminder of perspective.
"See you on the other side" is effectively the same as "you're going to heaven for this" and I love that
I'll enjoy the night with the git guy instead.
He knows how to commit.
:fake internet award:
What is a CVS guy
CVS is a high street pharmacy chain.
So the "CVS guy" is the cashier on checkout at the store.
In my town the CVS has a self checkout unless you hunt someone down. So maybe OP was talking to themselves
Considering OPs headspace at the time that's plausible. lol
What does high street mean? Main street?
I may not have realised I was using a British English specific term :)
"High Street" does etymologically derive from the main shopping street(s) in a town where most shops would have premises, as you suggest.
In a contemporary usage it means physical retail (versus online) and also connotes city centre, versus places that have enormous out of town "big box" stores.
So economists might say "The high street saw the best Christmas profits in five years" and they mean all retail in that sector of business.
So when I said CVS were a "high-street pharmacy" what I really meant to imply by that was "they are a brick-and-mortar chain with physical stores on streets in towns and cities all over the place"
Claim to use British English but didn't call it Acacia Avenue? Something seems fishy
Some old dude who hasn't moved on to newer version control systems like git or hg
It's the guy that makes fake CVs on demand.
A machinist? And they specialize in front wheel transaxles?
There is a store in the US called CVS. The “cvs guy” is the cashier/worker.
Cautionary Votive Spirit
Currently Vexed Soul - having to deal with customers, especially ones like that! :)
These kinds of verbal slip ups are universal, look how many comments and up votes this post has.
It's funny, just laugh about it, nobody should agonize over this funny and harmless bit of being a human.
I think of it as another bug in the Human Build 1.0, along with getting an eyelash in your eye and tripping over nothing. Once 2.0 comes out they will surely have all this stuff fixed.
Nah, 2.0 just adds more microtransactions.
For example, I bought some beer a couple of days ago, and after I paid the guy said "have a good evening and enjoy the beer"; and I said "you too"...
I guess I hadn't processed the second part quickly enough.
See if you say "you too and I will thanks!" That works. You too for the nice evening and then acknowledge that you WILL indeed be enjoying the beer.
I always just use my mom’s rewards for everything. I get the discounts and she gets the rewards points. 🤷🏼