Ask Lemmy

I was going through a very rough patch in my teens that felt inescapable, included feeling socially isolated. Anyway, one day I was walking down through the city Center with my head down, as usual. A really confident and attractive woman coming towards me stopped briefly and made a point of facing me directly. She had a beaming smile and said “Hi, you have a really nice smile”. She said it assertively and then moved on.

I felt human again and I’ve never forgotten the impact a complete stranger can have in just a brief moment. I try to be that person for others now.

In between my junior and senior in high school, my mom, and I and my brother were told that the house we were renting was being sold.

We had no place to go nobody would rent to us. That meant we were homeless. One of the neighbors let my mom sleep on her couch another neighbor let me sleep on their couch, a third neighbor let my brother sleep on their couch.

After about a month or so that my mom was able to get an old beat up trailer house from a relative. No cost we just had to figure out how to move it. It wasn’t gonna last for much longer than a year, but at least it would be something.

About a year later, Habitat for Humanity was able to get us a house. For those who think that means a free house. No that is not a free house. It’s a mortgage for the house at 0% interest. You repay the mortgage.

One time when I was much younger, I borrowed a trailer from a buddy to haul around some stuff that wouldn't fit in my Jeep.

When I initially borrowed it, my friend set up the hitch and locked it in place. I figured I'd be able to do the same when it came time to return it.

Well, I didn't do it right. I got on the road to return the trailer to my friend, and about 1000ft down the road, the trailer popped right off the hitch and started barreling down the road behind me toward a car.

The car stopped before the trailer hit it. A guy got out, grabbed the trailer, pulled it up to my Jeep before I could even say anything, and hitched it properly while I was apologizing.

He just said, "No worries" and went on his way. What a cool guy.

I'll give my story which is small but had a huge impact on me.

On my honeymoon. It's myself, my wife and a Chinese dude in a suit on our way to Indonesia on the last leg of the flight in the 3 seats.

We get chatting. Newlyweds, congratulations, yada yada. Back and forth. Lasts a decent amount of time. He laughs because we ask him if he's Indonesian (we've never been there before and Indonesian folks do not look Chinese lol).

Before he goes he gives us his business card and says we can call him 24/7 if we have any emergencies or difficulties of any kind on our trip. It was such a seemingly insignificant gesture but just took a bunch of hidden pressure off that we hadn't even thought was there.

It left a huge impression on me though we never needed it. Ever since I have liberally given my phone number to folks traveling to Ireland (including a nice chap on Lemmy that I nearly met up with). Nobody has ever called me but I would jump in the car on a moments notice if they did.

A friend and I tried to hitch from Calais to Paris in 1980 or so. Scruffy punks don't get lifts, turns out. We got the train and arrived in Paris late at night. Hotels by the station were either full or too expensive. We were staring at our map in despair when a young man asked if we needed help. Long story short, he walked us to his mother's flat and made up a bed for us on the sofa. She cheerfully made us breakfast in the morning - I got the impression her son often brought home waifs and strays. Really nice people.

I was riding an e-scooter, a van hit me and didn't stop to see if I was ok.

The car behind the van stopped, and the car driver offered me help, he said he would be willing to be my witness if I wanted to persue the van driver.

When I was in high school I was working in a grocery store for an after-school job. While on a weekend shift, a customer didn't seem to be having a good day and lashed out at me for not being to find something. A lady who I've never seen before came to my defense and stood up for me against the guy and actually vouched for me to my supervisor who came to intervene. That was the last time I think anyone has ever stood up for me.

I'm in Canada so being kind to strangers is an everyday thing.

A guy down the street from me has been having a garage sale pretty much every weekend. I think he was probably charging too much before and has eased up a bit. He's almost gotten rid of everything I usually see. I stopped in last weekend and he had a random assortment of old screwdrivers that said "free". I got to chatting with him and mentioned that I'm trying to get a shop together so I can build toys (my sister was complaining about how everything is plastic for her kids). He was like "wait right there". He ran into his garage and came out with armloads of tools and just said "there you go young man". I'm not sure what made me feel better, the tools or that fact I was called "young man" at 36.

Saying this with the caveat that many people don't love religion and I get that, but please hear me out. I am Christian (the kind that loves queer people and supports women's freedom to choose and whatall), and a couple of years ago my ex was in hospital which was a big shock. I did not have the supports and friends I do now, and it was lonely and scary and stressful. A very nice man on the street stopped me and asked if I would like a Virgin Mary medal to bless me, and that just made me feel so loved and cared for in that moment.

A woman saw me struggling to carry my heavy, unwieldy duffel bag (the shoulder strap had broken). She gave me a ride to the train station. I might have missed the train had she not helped!

Was riding my bike and hit a rock or unlevel sidewalk and fell off my bike. Couple of large scrapes. Stagger takes me into her nearby house and apply rubbing alcohol and bandaids. Left her house with a candy. (Years ago when I was a weeh lad)

I met a guy called Big Al on a family camping trip and he was pretty cool. He was the first hippy I ever met, living out of a van and trailer, solar panels all over the roof and making some money selling bags made from men's ties.

I don't really remember what he did other than maybe teaching me a fishing knot, maybe feeding me and showing me some cool stuff. At the very least, it's a very positive memory and possibly part of why I love the off grid dream.

I can't remember the last time a random stranger went out of their way to be kind to me.