Firoaren

k

I'd castrate myself if it meant I could be with that woman

E

There's no law against the pokey-man, Batman!

Mariokart

I was running Curse of Strahd, and my players managed to kill the Roc of Mt. Ghakis without even directly interacting with it.

This was actually on the heels of a major boss encounter where I ran a certain coven of hags as a (https://www.reddit.com/r/monsteraday/comments/90jss4/day_365_hag_covenbiest/)[covenbiest] out for revenge. When the party defeated them before, they decided they wanted to eat part of the hags as revenge, so they cut off some fingers, and each had one. I rolled some force damage (3d8) and on my (https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B7WbOcl0Q_ZvR21BcUZFMXlMSWc/view?usp=drivesdk&resourcekey=0-pCVKv7KV3DIEnS6sozkX1w)[d10,000 wild magic table] to determine what happened. Some laughes were had but nothing major. Cut to my party of 3 + an NPC half dead on the slopes of Mt. Ghakis, desperately trying to Tiny Hunt through a long rest in the blistering whiteout conditions of Mt. Ghakis with the covenbiest laying just outside, their and the party's blood everywhere. Happened to roll the Roc on the random encounter table and figured it'd be very interested in the scent of possible fresh carrion near its nest.

It landed. Immediately, I thought, "Well, its not stupid, it won't eat the vile-smelling unholy boss monster laying here" and said so. Party wanted to roll for it. I probably said something like "Ugh, fine," and that it probably wasn't hungry because there's only a 10% chance it had an unsuccessful hunt. We roll the d100, fuckin' 98. Fuck.

So I guesstimate how many d8s of damage to roll and the party run out and bum-rush the thing to make sure it's dead. Obviously the bird did not survive.

Why does this work?

Same, but more intense. It can affect the whole of the bottom of my feet sometimes, and I've never been able to consistently replicate it so I've no idea what triggers it either.

That man looks like he's suffering from AA- uh, alchoholism

As someone who's been on one, lemme tell ya,

The blades of the shithook are so perfectly sharp they sliced right through the sails of that boat and you can't even see them move before the camera's already moved on