Mildly Infuriating
Home to all things "Mildly Infuriating" Not infuriating, not enraging. Mildly Infuriating. All posts should reflect that.
I want my day mildly ruined, not completely ruined. Please remember to refrain from reposting old content. If you post a post from reddit it is good practice to include a link and credit the OP. I'm not about stealing content!
It's just good to get something in this website for casual viewing whilst refreshing original content is added overtime.
Rules:
1. Be Respectful
Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.
Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.
...
2. No Illegal Content
Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.
That means: -No promoting violence/threats against any individuals
-No CSA content or Revenge Porn
-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)
...
3. No Spam
Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.
-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.
-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.
-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers
-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.
...
4. No Porn/Explicit
Content
-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.
-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.
...
5. No Enciting Harassment,
Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts
-Do not Brigade other Communities
-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.
-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.
-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.
...
6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.
...
7. Content should match the theme of this community.
-Content should be Mildly infuriating.
-The Community !actuallyinfuriating has been born so that's where you should post the big stuff.
...
8. Reposting of Reddit content is permitted, try to credit the OC.
-Please consider crediting the OC when reposting content. A name of the user or a link to the original post is sufficient.
...
...
Also check out:
Partnered Communities:
Reach out to LillianVS for inclusion on the sidebar.
All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules.
view the rest of the comments
Unfortunately this is a pretty common occurrence. There was a big furor about it about a decade ago with a social media fad called the "hot car challenge" where adults would sit in hot cars turned off in the sun to see how long they could last in them ostensibly to build awareness of the problem, and there were all sorts of helpful tips and design changes made to cars and phones to try to make it more difficult to forget your kids in hot cars. Myself I wonder if any of it had any actual impact because surely the sort of people who leave their kids in hot cars aren't the smartest and probably don't keep up with safety PSAs about the issue.
The left shoe trick - throwing my shoe in the car next to the kid - probably saved my kid's life more than once.
One kind of parents who have these tragedies are tired ones. Which is most parents with small children.
Edit: not relevant in this case, but I'll take any chance to advertise the shoe trick.
I've been fucking tired as all hell, but a) I would not be driving a car with my child in it if I was so tired that I would forget I had a child. The fuck? That's it. There's no b). I would also fall asleep before I would forget I had a child. I cannot believe people really need a "trick" to help them remember they have a child. I just cannot relate.
I hope you're thankful for a lifestyle where you have that option. We should all strive to build a world where everyone does.
I mean, taking the bus should be an option in most cases, or? Maybe I'm inconsiderate right now?
In most US cities, no, it's not an option. But we should work to make it an option :)
In most cities in the US? That's crazy to me as a European lol. I guess I was acting privileged then.
Nah, you good. There's no way for you to know without way too much time investment.
New York, San Francisco, and maybe Chicago have workable systems. Atlanta's right on the edge, I would say. San Francisco seemed the best by far, but it still wasn't perfect. It also helps that San Francisco is tiny. I haven't been to Seattle or Portland, though. Maybe those are better
The smaller cities have super trash transit, mostly because they're too spread out
You mean area wise? 😅 Population wise it's like 8 times the size of my city...
Hahaha yeah, area. It's roughly 11km x 11km. Much easier to have frequent transit in that small area. Most US cities are way bigger
Right, okay, yeah! 😅
Plenty of place don't have buses in the states
https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/magazine/fatal-distraction-forgetting-a-child-in-thebackseat-of-a-car-is-a-horrifying-mistake-is-it-a-crime/2014/06/16/8ae0fe3a-f580-11e3-a3a5-42be35962a52_story.html
This article is worth a read. I think that anyone who says "I could NEVER...." are the exact people that are playing with fire. I don't have children, but I still get anxiety thinking about what would happen if I did and any number of variables came up at the wrong moment in time.
This is not an attack on you. This article really helped me understand a situation where it isn't some irresponsible person just leaving their kids alone for hours to get Botox assuming the car will stay on and cool. Humans are humans, and it's sickening and devastating to think about how a simple mistake, a hiccup in the brain, could lead to the death of your own child.
Great article and one I always share when this argument comes up. It can happen with one simple mistake.
I wish I could read it—it's paywalled. 😞
I gotcha ^^
https://web.archive.org/web/20150208051442/https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/magazine/fatal-distraction-forgetting-a-child-in-thebackseat-of-a-car-is-a-horrifying-mistake-is-it-a-crime/2014/06/16/8ae0fe3a-f580-11e3-a3a5-42be35962a52_story.html
As a parent myself it always boggles my mind that people can forget that they have kids in the car with them. I'm always in dad mode when I have any kids with me, so I've never even come close to forgetting a kid in the car. Forgetting to grab the kid's backpack for school sure, but forgetting a whole child in the car?
The biggest thing that most of those people have in common is that they think it couldn't happen to them.
Before I had kids I would've been right there with you, but I am in a completely different mindspace anytime I'm caring for my kids than when I'm not.
When I'm in "dad mode" there's a significant portion of my attention that's constantly running through "Are the kids getting into trouble? When did I last see them? When were they last fed/watered/potty breaks? Are we about to pass something that they'll see and decide they need to go to and therefore cost more time/money than I've budgeted for this trip and should I be taking a different route to avoid it? When did I last observe the kids alive, has it been more than 60 seconds I need to check on them again..." And the only way to break out of dad mode is if somebody else has taken over active care/monitoring of the kids or if the kids are both asleep in their beds. It's a biological state that I seriously did not know was possible, and I simply can't turn it off.
So when I say I can't forget my kids in the car, this is what I mean, I'm so actively aware of my kids location and status at all times that I'm the primary caretaker that they can't even try to wander off in a park or store without my noticing
Yeah, I've got that too. But confidence leads to complacency. I've thankfully never had it happen when it mattered, but on a couple of occasions I've found myself not being hypervigilant when I normally would be. It's back on once I notice, but it only takes one slip up.
Most of these cases also involve a change in routine. You go about your normal day, feeling the way you normally do, because your mind has forgotten that something is different. Trusting your instinct to overcome that just isn't a foolproof plan. I mean there is no foolproof plan, but there's also no harm in taking a little extra precaution in your routine like putting your shoe or your wallet in the back seat.
I find that after having kids and seeing on the news what can go wrong, there is zero confidence in the kids or their surroundings. That's why I have confidence in myself that I would never forget them, because I'm always scared. 😆 Never let them out of my sight on a parking lot, e.g. They will just start running and you need to wrangle and holler. Hold their hand over a cross walk, etc etc etc.
The thing is, I have two kids, and have heard about hot car deaths for years before having kids, so I make sure it doesn't happen. I never leave the kids alone in the car on a hot day. They come with. Luckily we have cold weather most of the year so they can sit alone for a few minutes in a cold car, but never during the summer. Like, even before hearing about hot car deaths, I knew from a young age that cars get hot, and it's just common sense not to leave a child in there, because I wouldn't want to sit in there myself for any amount of time. Doesn't matter if the AC is on full blast, that thing might cut out or fail for any reason, and then my kids are goners.
I mean I've left the house without my glasses and I'm legally blind without them, so I can understand just how absentminded a human can get.
That's the thing. We non-absent-minded people cannot relate to how absent-minded people can be. We do not understand.
It depends how often you drive without the kids.
If you don't always drop the kids off yourself, it's easy to get half way to work on autopilot before realising you meant to drop them off.
Sleep deprivation is a weird thing.
I felt the same, until I had my first lousy sleeper (child who had trouble sleeping due to minor health stuff). After a month of lost sleep, I couldn't remember my own name sometimes. I read once that sleep deprivation is effectively brain damage, and after that experience, I believe it.
Plenty of smart parents fuck up while sleep deprived. That’s what made it such a popular tragedy to make PSAs about.
After having kids I totally understand how it can happen by mistake.
As a parent myself, I'm now doubly amazed at how few cases of forgetting happen. It's so easy to do, and your brain is reduced to blomonge by sleep deprivation.
FYI, the "baby on board" signs aren't generally meant as "don't crash into me" signs, but "assume the driver is drunk and distracted" signs. Having been there, I try and give them plenty of space!