this post was submitted on 13 Nov 2024
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Greentext

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[โ€“] Canadian_Cabinet@lemmy.ca 178 points 4 months ago (2 children)

In middle school I had a friend who would get nosebleeds fairly often. I don't remember exactly why nor how, but we somehow got into an argument with this really religious kid who was a little shit. So like the next day he felt a nosebleed coming and ran over to the kid and said "Hail Satan" and exhaled hard to make a ton of blood come out. Well the kid fainted and my friend got detention for the day

[โ€“] dditty@lemm.ee 46 points 4 months ago

That's amazing ๐Ÿคฃ

[โ€“] Nythos@sh.itjust.works 20 points 4 months ago (1 children)
[โ€“] Robust_Mirror@aussie.zone 8 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Could they have stolen the story? Yes. But they could have equally had a similar experience, it's not that implausible. I've known people that have nose bleeds like that, it's not some incredibly rare condition, and saying hail Satan is the kind of thing tons of edgy kids/teens would do.

Things can happen more than once.

[โ€“] Ziglin@lemmy.world 3 points 4 months ago

I did something similar to my mother. Except I came downstairs with blood all over my face and hands (I hadn't found a tissue yet) and then tried acting like a zombie. I thought it was hilarious. She was shocked but got over it pretty quickly.

[โ€“] Sanctus@lemmy.world 78 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Ah, the fear of consequences after a good prank at school. I drew a dick on a whiteboard once, also in seventh grade.

[โ€“] radix@lemmy.world 57 points 4 months ago (3 children)

That's going to go on your Permanent Record!!

[โ€“] metaStatic@kbin.earth 20 points 4 months ago

Ah, you got the stink lines and everything

[โ€“] Pyro@programming.dev 3 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

Never gonna live it down now @Sanctus

[โ€“] SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de 3 points 4 months ago

Actually it will go into the dry erase record

[โ€“] FreshLight@sh.itjust.works 45 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

*Student shows signs of severe depression*

*gets suspended from school*

Even if it was a joke, this is some "Tell me you're from the US without telling me you're from the US" type shit

[โ€“] M137@lemmy.world 34 points 4 months ago (3 children)

Would be funnier if he accidentally made himself quadriplegic and was just lying there in terror as everyone else was laughing and it took a good while before someone realised.

[โ€“] Jax@sh.itjust.works 38 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Idk if we agree on what 'funnier' means.

Well, it's fake either way, might as well chuckle at some black humor.

[โ€“] Agent641@lemmy.world 8 points 4 months ago (1 children)

And he was still suspended

[โ€“] CascadianGiraffe@lemmy.world 3 points 4 months ago

Well yeah, how else would he get around?

[โ€“] don@lemm.ee 7 points 4 months ago

Reminds me of the British comedian who had a heart attack on stage and died, while the audience laughed, thinking it was all just an act. Cant remember his name, but at least he died doing what he loved.

[โ€“] pinkystew@reddthat.com 11 points 4 months ago

sounds like fiction. it's just missing "he thought to himself,"

[โ€“] AsudoxDev@programming.dev 11 points 4 months ago (1 children)

"runs out the door"

why? why would people run out the door at someone commiting suicide?

[โ€“] noli@lemmy.zip 14 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Maybe to go find someone with medical training who can potentially help?

[โ€“] AsudoxDev@programming.dev 2 points 4 months ago

At least one person would stay

[โ€“] WILSOOON@programming.dev 4 points 4 months ago

God that i hilariozs, i tried to to a similar thing in the final exam but my crack juices weren't flowing sadly

[โ€“] SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org 2 points 4 months ago

Wh.. what if you really can't take it anymore?