this post was submitted on 09 Jun 2025
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TenForward: Where Every Vulcan Knows Your Name

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[–] [email protected] 44 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Paris: Built a brand new shuttle with an experimental warp drive pushing the limits of theoretical warp technology from his own design specs with limited resources in an entirely different quadrant far away from friendly manufacturing facilities and science.

LaForge: The head of the fleet museum cleaned up a recovered saucer section and attached it to an existing, intact and functional spare star drive section of the same class, with all of the manufacturing at his disposal and tons of spare time.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Yeah, but Paris also got to fuck the delta flyer

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago

Plus that one ship that fucked him.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Sure, but did the enterprise ever go Warp 10 and turn Geordi into a lizard that had babies with Picard?

Didn't think so. Checkmate.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The warp 10 thing never happened, but if it did, it was in a Type 9 Shuttle, before the Flyer was invented.

This post brought to you by, “Um, Actually.”

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Never happened? Has it been retconned?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

No, it was actually confirmed cannon in the Voyager episode of Lower Decks with animatronic salamanders in one exhibit. It’s just that some fans like to pretend this episode never happened, much like Scrubs season 9 or any Indiana Jones movie after The Last Crusade.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

There's a VOY episode after Threshold where Paris claims to have never flown at transwarp speeds, so it was reasonable to believe it had been retconned away.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

It's gone beyond warp 10 at least twice. But, no, the lizard thing didn't happen to Geordi. It did happen to someone (Troi) on the Enterprise, but under totally different circumstances.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

But, no, the lizard thing didn’t happen to Geordi.

Or did it?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Whoa what? I hella don't remember that. What episode is this?!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

very cool episode where he has to solve a mystery with nothing but a holorecording, pretty brilliant actually.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Also one of TNG’s creepier episodes. At least it left a pretty strong impression on me as a kid.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Not to be confused with Kitt bashing.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago

Also not to be confused with Kirk bashing:

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

Keep Knight Rider KITT safe!

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Well of course he's an amateur. He's a pilot, part of the bridge crew. How's your baking, La Forge? Up to scratch?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

He programs the FUCK out of a Risian Daquiri, also I like to load up his [Perfect Sunset Date] holodeck program when I'm having a tough day. just relax and eat some fall off the bone Spare Ribs while Mandolin chamber music soothes my soul. The dating aspect of the program isn't necessary. it's nice to treat yourself for a change.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

it’s nice to treat yourself for a change.

I kinda read that as "it’s nice to treat yourself for a challenge." and thought part of it would be fending off LaForge's advances.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Well, one was built from scratch while the other is basically just a Theseus' Enterprise.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

One was built from scratch, one was repaired by the head of the fleet museum whose job it is to restore and maintain old ships at a functional starbase

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

He’s a lieutenant, admiral. Maybe give him a few minutes before we go expecting him to rebuild the entire starfleet by hand, blindfolded, hm?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

So I'm not saying this to be a pedantic ass, for the record. I'm saying this because I like learning new things and sharing new things to learn. But Geordi isn't an Admiral, as hilarious as that is. Data had the excuse of being dead or plugged into the matrix. Everyone else from the bridge crew other than Deanna ends up being an Admiral. She probably knew she wasn't going to get the promotion when she could sense someone hiding something. But poor old Geordi gets stuck as Commodore.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Or was Geordi the smartest of them all instead of pursuing relentless advancement he remembered the words of Admiral Kirk:

"Don't let them promote you. Don't let them transfer you. Don't let them do anything that takes you off the bridge of that ship, because while you're there, you can make a difference."

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Well, I mean, they had him the head of a museum. About as far from the bridge as you can get

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

A museum full of bridges, but I get your meaning. However, for an engineer, maybe that's the difference he wanted to make.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

We can at least try to make them look good.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I don't make gifs, just hastily edit existing with the default tools at hand. Beautiful work.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Even with my GIF skills, fuck making a whole nice gif for a single joke lol

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

Is it canon that he captained the galaxy class Challenger? Or are we just kinda accepting that's what probably happened despite the timeline changes

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

Paris, charming dilettante, nothing more. Sniff.