No Stupid Questions

I wish I had enough money to buy 25 acres without a clear idea of what to do with it.

Research what you are allowed to do with that land. In my country you are not allowed to simply buy agricultural land and start building stuff on it and that is the case in most civilized countries.

Ah. Someone found my field of fucks. See that I had none left to give.

Plant a lot of trees. Be the owner of a forest. Just be proud.

Dark-sky site?

Sit around and be a land lord. The farmer slaves can just plant and harvest stuff for you oh lord of the dirt field!

Fence it, let it regrow and let lose a shit ton of chickens. Market free range eggs.
If you lease it to a farmer, you're no better than a landlord (in fact, you are one) and I don't see why the whole of lemmy doesnt start pissing on you right away.

Build a whole theme park

place a monument to something there, and other stuff.

Farm things?

Plant a shtload of trees and bushes, let it go 'wild', put cottages in between, spaced so they don't see each other.

A 'back to nature' retreat around the corner.

Looks like a farm, maybe plant something?

Build a large wall around the entire perimeter of the property.

Construct a tall stone tower in the middle of the property and paint it completely matt black.

Poison the land around the tower, so nothing, not even grass can grow.

Have packs of wild, feral dogs roam the property.

Dress in dark grey robes, and spend the rest of your days on the top of the tower, screaming obscenities at any passers-by, or shaking your fist angryly at the sky.

Do nothing, watch nature claim it back.

Vineyards around here have set up wedding venues. People pay stupid amounts of money for weddings. If you can set up a few areas that are particularly photogenic you'd be good. Much of the land you could just leave to nature, which could be a huge part of the appeal. Make a few trails and like 2-3 buildings for the wedding and reception.

Start a cult

Sell it and remember that you first figure out what you want and then you buy the suitable land for it.

Plant potatoes. Charge rich families to come out and harvest potatoes as a "total farm experience". Sell them as a "rustic handgrown" crop.

Take the profit and buy a shit ton of meth and smoke until your heart explodes. Die with a smile as you escape late stage capitalism ✨️

What's the legality of that land?

Where I live there's no way a plot of land is suited for both farming and a Hotel.

If you build something in a place where residential/commercial buildings are not allowed you are in for a lot of troubles.

If the weather provides the safest bet for the most profit would probably be plant some easy trees or some plant that would not need a lot of caring, and just sell the products.

That for money. If I were you and I had money to throw I would just built a retire House for myself and collect my returns in peace of mind and health. But then again, residential buildings may not be allowed there.

What will people do there? The same thing people have done for 10,000 years. Alcohol, sex, and games.

Boy do I have a lifehack for you

Take a tupperware container set and test the water supplied to the field for PH value using a pack of litmus papers, then test the four corners and center of your field by scooping up some dirt, adding some water, and testing with litmus paper. Next, drain out the water and let it evaporate and look for signs of crystalization or condensates. Seal some of your soil samples to see if a healthy soil biome blooms in the sample, fungus and such.

A good healthy soil will have a strong biome. It and its water supply should be close to PH 6 to 7 for most tall grass and similar crops. There should be little to no saline in your soil, signs of that might indicate a brine pit forming in the water table near your land.

The most valuable single-season crops are crops that you can process yourself rather than selling to a granary. For examples: milled flour, corn byproducts, alcoholic ingredients, beets for sugar, bamboo, or switchgrass fermented into propionic acid biofuel. The major downside to being your own processor is that you're also your own distributor which is very difficult.

Sometimes subsidies make unprofitable crops profitable, sometimes granaries or local brewers offer a good price for specific crops. Be sure to check the local market thoroughly.

Make sure to join up with any farming groups in your area and get insured for any farming you do. Also get somebody to provide some bee boxes.

There's some great ideas in this thread but sadly I think most of them are fairly high risk.

Doing anything in this kind of scope is going to cost a lot of capital. If it goes wrong all that money is gone.

I would lease it to a farmer.

Maybe reserve a corner where you can build up some basic facilities. I'm not sure what's popular where you are but here in Australia you can find places like this on hipcamp where you can camp for a few dollars a day.

Use your income to build basic facilities over time. Toilets, showers, kitchen, solar.

Pawlonia trees. Fastest growing wood in the world

Sell 1x1 foot squares of it in a vending machine at a random gas station in the middle of nowhere.

Plant some dang trees for starters, unless it's only going to be land used for farming.