this post was submitted on 26 Mar 2024
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[–] [email protected] 128 points 1 year ago (10 children)

If you're having trouble understanding what this map means, it means that the suicide rate for men is higher than for women everywhere, notably 5 to 6 times higher in Eastern Europe and Russia, and 8 times higher in a couple of Central American countries and West Africa.

I wonder what makes men the world over decide that suicide is the best option.

[–] [email protected] 111 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I would imagine toxic masculinity.

Men are encouraged to be stoic and not express their emotions.

Most men don't have a single friend they can talk openly about their emotions with.

[–] [email protected] 58 points 1 year ago

They are also told their entire lives that everyone relies on them and then are publicly shamed if they fail. Plus being first in line for any violent conflict, where they might lose the few friends they have and no outlets since showing any weakness is punished.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago (2 children)

It's interesting how terms like toxic masculinity lead to instant downvotes from a certain type of person but if you make the exact same comment without it you get zero downvotes.

It's almost like people have been conditioned to be reflexively averse to specific words without actually understanding what they mean.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago

It's just a poor term overall. To a lot of people it sounds like masculinity itself was toxic and bad, instead of pointing to a toxic form of it.

Should just have a better, less confusing word for it.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago

Toxic masculinity was a term coined by men wanting to be free from the expectations of the patriarchy. It's beyond heart breaking that so many men parodoxically react with anger to this phrase. Double so while bemoaning the lack of mental health options for men.

My good dudes, you're literally building the cages for yourself.

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[–] [email protected] 40 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I wonder what makes men the world over decide that suicide is the best option.

Because if you don't have a partner and high paying job, you aren't just worthless, you are a burden.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 year ago

Hey now, you can have both of those things and still be a burden.

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[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Men are overly hormonal. Domestic abuse, war, homicide.... They should take a more logical stance instead of being a slave to their feelings.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (8 children)

What a great specimen of Finnish self-aware sarcasm.

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Women actually attempt suicide more. Men just die from it more. This is mostly because men tend to use firearms and women tend to use poisoning/overdose (not necessarily narcotics)

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/35598742/

https://thehill.com/policy/healthcare/4009420-more-women-attempt-suicide-more-men-die-by-suicide/amp/

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I wonder if evolution isn't at play. Females killing themselves off is an awful reproductive strategy. Males doing the same is not such a big deal.

If I'm not clear: A woman takes about a year from attempting to get pregnant to gestation to birth to recovery. I could impregnate hundreds of women in a year. And so could any other man. We're simply not as valuable.

And yes, men have plenty of value outside sperm donation, I was trying to shine a harsh light.

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[–] [email protected] 76 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I have no way to know the lived experience of women, but I have observed since about 4 years of age that the buck stops with me. I, and I suspect the vast majority of men, have no backstop - If I have any problem that I can't fix myself, or can't pay money to get assistance with, I am fucked.

I hear anecdotally that women are more likely to tell people about suicidal ideation... Does this imply that women have better results using social networks to move past the stressors or illness behind that ideation?

Best case if I was feeling like I couldn't bear to keep living and told someone, maybe a family member would have me committed for my own good. Then after the imprisonment, I am also unemployed and still have no one with the bandwidth to help me deal with whatever issues I was having.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 year ago

I have observed since about 4 years of age that the buck stops with me. I, and I suspect the vast majority of men, have no backstop - If I have any problem that I can't fix myself, or can't pay money to get assistance with, I am fucked.

I think this is an important observation. Women, almost always, have some avenue of potential support, even if it's unsavory. Men very often have nothing.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Afaik suicide attempt rates are 2-3x more common in women than men. Men are just more likely to choose methods that are more deadly.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 year ago (10 children)

Not to belittle it on either side but I do wonder what causes that disparity. Is it that men plan it more thoroughly or have access to more dangerous methods? Do women choose methods that, unintentional or not, can be backed out of more easily? Are women more likely to report a failed attempt than men? If that 2-3x factor is true, then why don't we see similar numbers of idk completion? I hesitate to say success because it is very much not a success to commit suicide, there are always other options, even if they're not perfect.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I've heard the claims that women generally opt for less effective methods because they're more likely to want to leave an opportunity to back out, or try to avoid leaving a messy corpse. I have not data here, these are simply claims I've heard.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I've heard the latter, as in even in death women are thinking about others.

Anecdotally, I've heard that almost universally. Every woman or girl I know who has chosen not to commit suicide, someone having to find their corpse factored highly in their reasons.

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[–] [email protected] 67 points 1 year ago (11 children)
[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago (11 children)

Why? The red and orange are close in color, otherwise it shows if it is green in color, more women commit suicide than men, then the ratio goes up by color

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If it is green then they have the same average right? 1:1. But in this graph it would be difficult to show when more women committed suicide, which might nowhere be the case.

Or you'd get 0.5 with a color match, for example.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Women literally never commit suicide at the same rate or less, that's kind of the point.

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

Are you colorblind?

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[–] [email protected] 37 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I'm a man, USA. In my personal experience, which doesn't mean very much, I've noticed that men seem unable to accept catastrophy. They try to reason or wiggle a way out of it. Woman seem more at ease when dealing with horrible events.

If I had to guess, it is a difference in perception and experience. Perhaps men are groomed to be "providers, problem solvers," and so they despair at unsolvable problems, while women are told not to "overreact," and to "support" others in times of crisis. Like a weird inverted effect of patriarchal society.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 year ago

Expanding on this it could be that women deal with catastrophe (e.g. SA/rape) much earlier in life so later catastrophes are perceived as imminently survivable.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Men are groomed to hide feelings. We are often told from very young age don't be a sissy. Suck it up. Be a man. From young age you are thought that showing emotion makes you less of a man, makes you a sub-human. But we all have issues, pent up emotions and problems. Then one day you simply stop wanting things. Or pain becomes too much.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago

Women are also often taught to expect unfairness.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago

Wasn't paying attention and misread the map at first. It's showing male suicides / female suicides. So a green nation would be 1:1 equal suicide by gender. So every nation has a strong bias towards male suicide, some much more so than others.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago

So the data suggests we should promote women's suicides more /s

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago (2 children)

It would be interesting to find a way to also represent the overall rate. Some of these countries really stand out for their high male:female ratio even though their overall rates are not particularly high.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Total numbers aren't relevant for ratios unless the numbers are low enough that the ratio swings wildly from year to year.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Low numbers could also mean that the tracking/reporting in that country isn't very good and therefore the data isn't reliable.

In some cultures suicide has a very negative stigma attached to it, which can result in suicide deaths being reported with other causes.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Look at all that "privilege".

[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Two things can be true. Privilege does not guarantee happiness or satisfaction in life.

As a cis-het-white male I have basically every mainstream privilege, as a result I've lived most of my life completely unaware of the discrimination many others face on a daily basis. When "SJW" first became a term I considered myself anti-SJW. I was depressed and struggling in life and being told I had advantages over other people was not something I wanted to hear. Since then my understanding of what privilege is and means has changed a lot.

Having privilege does not have to be a scary thing and you are not a worse person because you have privilege. It's simply a fact of life. We intrinsically understand that attractive and/or talented people have advantages in life and get treated better based on traits that are purely biological, those traits do not guarantee those people happy or even productive lives. Take that knowledge and apply it to race/gender/sexuality and you understand privilege.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Is it all attempted suicides or successful suicides only?

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)

A suicide rate means successful, just like a murder rate is successful murders and not attempted murder.

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Considering various social taboos around suicide, I'm not sure how reliable such data is.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Counting corpses is pretty reliable, objective data.

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