big yes from me
this post was submitted on 03 May 2025
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Autism
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I learned that being chatty and introverted are not mutually exclusive long before I got my diagnoses. Just because I can, and will, tell my server they got my order wrong when it's wrong doesn't mean I am an extrovert. It means I am high and not feeling socially anxious and I really want my burger the way I asked.
ADHD and Autism require diagnosis.
So......not me.
It’s not hard to get a test you just need to grow yourself a money tree.
It’s not hard to get a test
Even if money isn't an issue, it's actually really hard (particularly for someone with ADHD symptoms) to take the official test. It's very Catch-22.
funny thing, I took my test in NZ where it's cheaper and easier apparently, still cost a couple of thousand $NZ but I was given a bunch of forms to fill in.. Found a quiet place to do them in time, read them and filled them in. then realised I'd not read them properly and had to request the forms be resent to complete a second time, this time body doubling with the misses to ensure I'd read and completed them appropriately.
felt like it was part of the test
can you read and fill in these forms by yourself? no, no I can't..
I have money but its a 3 year wait if you can convince a GP to refer you.... so that's still fun.
I got mine done by a clinical psychology master's student supervised by their professor. It was half the price (and my insurance ended up covering 40%), no GP referral required. If anyone reading this has a college or university near them, check if they have that option. Added bonus is that the students are usually more up to date on current diagnostic criteria compared to someone who has been practicing in the field for a while.
I also get my dental check ups done at the university dental school for the same reason.
Holy shit, 3 years?
My GP was doing a conference, her replacement was literally the person in the entire region in charge of this specific area.
She said "we could do tests, but it would only eventually come across my desk to give the final stamp. You don't need that. You have ADHD"
I know I got lucky, but... Three years...
I was able to convince my GP to get me a reference after my son was diagnosed. The diagnosis he got was for anything required from school. I got a waiting time of 10 years via the public system or 2 years via the private. My diagnosis could not entitle me for anything else than 'better know myself'.
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Apparently, wolf wizardry.
Exactly! I mean, my son has an autism diagnosis, and my wife has ADS, and my best friend has both, and I work in a field where almost everyone is diagnosed with something, but surely I am normal, because no one diagnosed me. Yet.
Me: "That's not ADHD, that's just being human!"
Her: "No, no, really, not."
Me: "What are you saying? I don't have ADHD."
Her: "You sure?"
Me: "Of course I'm sure."
Me: Joins lemmy.
Lemmy: Lots of ADHD memes.
Me: "Huh."
And yes, I thought I was the only really outgoing shy person I knew of, and I couldn't ever make sense of it.
Huh, funnily enough I thought this was about the opposite. I barely have a social battery, so I don't meet up with people much, and only for a limited time. But when I do, I'm the life of the party.
It probably is. Don't let my experience invalidate yours even a tiny little bit.
I think both of our experiences are perfectly valid
This is probably because introvert and extrovert are just made up and there's no evidence anyone falls neatly into either.
What is extroverted introverted?
An extrovert with social anxiety.
This is my best friend to a T. Recently diagnosed with ADHD as well.
I swear I will get officially diagnosed and medicated this year. I know I've said it for about a decade, but this is the year, lol.
Found a doctor that was just like "oh yeah. You definitely have ADHD. Let's get you some meds"
After like 10 years of referrals that I either never went to follow up on or got pushed away from I finally got medicaded.
It literally took luck because I was always just so demotivated by the whole process. They literally make it the most difficult for people with ADHD to actually get to the point of talking to someone. While people that just want Adderall can easily navigate it with their executive function fully functioning.
It's rough. Good luck mate.
Best of luck!
There are dozens of us
It's a way of describing that a person is willing to join social interaction, but also enjoys alone time
Isn't that everyone, more or less? We all need a balance between spending time with others, and time by ourselves.
If I don't get an appropriate amount of both on a regular basis I go crazy.
Most of ADHD is just "isn't that everyone" symptoms but to a much greater and often disabling degree.
It's why memes and stereotypes are usually relatable to a lot of people. I wouldn't say it's an inaccurate thing to say. But it's definitely too generalizing.
Its just another weird way people who are not specialists try to divide and label everyone for no clear reason to fit into their binary world, I just don't like how its being used. There is too much simplification and generalization while every person is unique. Not saying such things as introvert/extravert should not exist, I just don't like how its being interpreted in mass/social media
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Ive always referred to myself as a social introvert. Ill go to social events, have fun, but boy is it exhausting and id rather spend time home alone doing nothing
There are a bunch of different definitions people use for introversion/extroversion. "Extroverted introvert" means you're extroverted by one definition and introverted by a different one.
I think it's someone who is actually extroverted, but do to being cast out as "weird", is now reluctant to talk to people despite their extraversion, and therefore thinks they're introverted.
This describes my case perfectly. I am extroverted, but due to people finding me weird, I was scared of talking to people, and mistook it for introversion. I am now way more outgoing than before once I figured it out, and people care a bit less about you being weird if you're likeable once you're older.
It might also be the other way around. There are plenty of people who are really introverted, so social engagement still drains their energy, but while it's happening, they can be/appear extroverted, charming, outgoing, sometimes at exponential extra cost.
The difference between intro- and extraversion is not simply the ability of a person to talk to others, their (perceived) "shyness" etc., but also encompasses how they regenerate, what and how much stimulation they prefer and what kind of company they need and enjoy.
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I was like this. I was diagnosed at 28 years old, and now I'm 39. The last remnants of my extroverted tendencies are dying, though. I recently had two friends ghost me because of trauma influenced behavior that I was experiencing. People pretend they're tolerant of autism riiiiiiiight up until something genuinely difficult happens. Then you get to see how your "friendship" was based on a masked version of you and therefore completely fake.
Someone I thought I had a 20 year "friendship" with ghosted me with zero explanation after I moved 1600 miles across the country to live closer to. My extraverted tendencies cause more harm than the loneliness that comes with introversion. It's just not worth it.
🙈
I avoid people at all cost, and for the special few that make it into my life, I just won't shut the fuck up 😭
It's a problem, every night my partner has to manage my chattiness, if allowed I will just pillow-talk until 2am.
but yeah, I'm not autistic.
That's not autism. That's social anxiety.
Why not both!
Are those separate things or is there a connection?
Like:
I'm curious, how many "Hawaiian pizza eaters" found out they had adhd or autism later in life?
Yes, how you socialize and how much it drains you are affected by whether or not you’re autistic and/or ADHD.
People who are naturally outgoing but also autistic/ADHD have the same drive to go out and interact with people, but due to differences in how they act/perceive the world wind up much more drained from the experience (either from sensory overstimulation or anxiety from people being unpredictable). This often leads to seeking out socialization less, even though they are just as desperate for it as anyone else who is naturally more extroverted.
And instead of typing up a paragraph every time they want to talk about it, they say introverted extrovert.
i am not but i very well might be if i ever let a pro check me out
I used to call myself an introvert with extrovert tendacies and so ya, I'm in this meme lol.
I was diagnosed at 56 with ADHD and Autism. So many fuck ups of mine make sense now.
...shut up. -.-
What a weird way to say ambivert.
Kind of, I was always just introverted and finding out I had autism and unlearning the coping mechanisms I made from not knowing wtf was going on made me able to be more extraverted then before, at least briefly.
I am in this, but I got tested and I'm "normal" even though in my 20s I'm pretty sure I would have been in the very high ranges.
I'd still say I have an ADHD brain with OCD tendencies, but I've managed to moderate both through a decade of exercise, caffeine, and sugar.
(Anecdotal, N=1) I think once your brain realizes in some sense that it can be productive despite its neuroses, the extremes peter out once the stress of your failures no longer hang over you.
Me.
Yes.
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