pissing standing up
I sit on my throne like a king.
this post was submitted on 02 Jan 2025
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I sit down every time I go to piss because it's one if the few places where I can be sure I'll be left alone. It's not about the piss. It's about the break.
It's also about not spraying piss all over my floor
Or having both hands for the phone, or not needing to blind yourself with a light in the middle of the night. So many reasons.
Mark your territory, boy.
Yes, I too like it spraying urine on my balls and pecker as I piss like a racehorse and it ricochets off the front of the bowl.
Oh you'd hate to know about how when you shit sitting down you get Poseidon's kiss.
That's why I shit standing up like a real man
While standing, do you shit directly into the water so that all the women in your vicinity get aroused by the sound of the splash or are you a stealth shitting fuckboy like Anon? And how exactly do you aim? So many questions.
You face towards the toilet, stand right on the toilet seat, and aim the shit directly into the water.
That gives you highest drop distance for maximum splash sound and maximum bitches.
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Only in a greentext will OP talk about their family members getting horny over little things
The solution clearly is to piss on her to establish dominance
Try hearing all of your neighbors pissing...
I swear to Christ, I think I've stumbled onto the one apartment building with paper-thin walls that's also filled to the brim with neighbors who aim straight for the water...
why sinks are more practical
Yeah, but take the dishes out.
Leave them in, saves water.
Someone told me urine was sterile once... Probably true.
It's quite low in bacteria when fresh, so in situations clean water is unavailable fresh urine can substitute in a pinch. But it's not fully sterile, and given even a couple of hours outside the body it grows significant colonies.
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it's better to piss in the sink, than to sink in the piss
You guys with your weird water-to-the-brim toilets. My first encounter with an American toilet made me think it was clogged. So I pissed outside to satiate my feral needs.
the hell kind of toilet were you using? they usually have water in like the bottom third and the water level only goes up for a moment when you flush.
That's just because they don't have water in European toilets, they flush by spitting into the toilet until the poo goes down.
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Short units make high pressure. Smart girls hear the Reynolds number and know
/r/sinkpissers
Not sure if we have a lemmy community for this yet
Is there a queue for moderators?
ok, sidepoint, but the other day I realized that urinals are just dedicated walls for people to pee on and I think that's really sweet
I've got news for you, on festivals there are sometimes literal metal walls to piss on with a drain beneath.
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How is that sweet im curious
Well its probably sweet if you're diabetic
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Okay hear me out, the water splashes less. It makes sound but if you piss on the ceramic the piss moisture comes back at you which is disgusting.
You gotta improve your angle so the piss whirlpools around the bowl
Trick-pissing champ here, the real homies bank their shots off the shower walls first before swirling it around the bowl for the finale. If I've been drinking heavily the night before, I'll piss fakey or throw in some yoga poses to up the challenge. The only way to be great is to push yourself a little farther each time you step up to the bowl.
Behind the knee and then over the shoulder has always been a crowd pleaser for me. I've had friends recently get into the long distance bracket, they often practice with their backs against the wall and piss hitting the urinal in a public washroom. They often score for distance and duration.
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The main reason to aim for the water is as contingency for split streams. Aim for center so that split streams have less chance of breaching the toilet bowl perimeter
It's the 3am total darkness pisses. You use the sound to locate your stream and angle. Then you can hit the water/bowl interface and then fire for effect.
As the stream lessens you micro adjust to stay in the sweet zone.
Nobody wants to hit the edge, spray all over your shins then bend over to wipe it up and slip in your own piss spray slippery floor and knock yourself out on the pissy rim only to wake up to all your family looking at you in distain as you lay on the pissy floor.
Oddly specific but also very relatable. Well done.
Nobody wants to hit the edge, spray all over your shins then bend over to wipe it up and slip in your own piss
This is why guys get married, to escape this hazaed... Night piss everywhere and ignore it, have the wife clean it up and complain endlessly.
This is also the leading cause of divorce apparently, according to the Wikipedia article on the matter.
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No, the main reason is establish dominance with your loud, heavy flow piss stream. The splashes on the seat you intentionally kept down are there to mark your territory against any pissers that wish to challenge you.
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I’ve found the opposite. Due to the angles of the sides of the bowl, a majority of rebound splash inside the toilet still, whereas directly in the water you get the pee waters vouching back chaotically and making their way more on the rim and out of the toilet.
I hope this was a joke.
I dont like to hold it so i pee many small amounts a day. Its hard to code with a full bladder
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So that's why some "men" piss standing, despite soiling the toilet each.fucking.time.
I'll add that I currently live in a house full of women, I'm the only male and women can absolutely fucking DESTROY bathrooms. I've never cleaned so much piss, beauty care debris, hair and blood in my whole life. Maybe lets chill on the gender bullshit before you get yourself so hyped up you have to retreat to your friendly discord server of mindless, performative people who support your every stupid idea.
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Why do you put men in quotation marks? Almost seems like yer trying to stir up some trouble, pardner.
If the men around you can't aim or clean up after themselves, that's a them problem. And I guess a you problem if you have to deal with it, but even more so if you're too chickenshit to call it out. I've never left a bathroom less clean than when I went in, and a lot of people have this same attitude. A lot don't, but a lot do also.
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