this post was submitted on 07 Jan 2025
1395 points (100.0% liked)

The Onion

5710 readers
661 users here now

The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

Great Satire Writing:

founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS
all 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] enbyecho@lemmy.world 116 points 2 months ago
[–] Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world 106 points 2 months ago (3 children)

Is that the guy that likes to give blow jobs to dead pigs?

[–] rc__buggy@sh.itjust.works 39 points 2 months ago

That's probably how he caught werewolf gonorrhea.

[–] MelodiousFunk@slrpnk.net 14 points 2 months ago

You have to be careful with information like that. It might encourage some greedy little pigboy to become an hero.

[–] WhiskyTangoFoxtrot@lemmy.world 11 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I thought that was former UK Prime Minister David Cameron.

[–] UpperBroccoli@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 2 months ago

¿Por que no los dos? Maybe they even like to do it together?

[–] athairmor@lemmy.world 81 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Almost worth making a Facebook account to disseminate facts like this.

[–] adarza@lemmy.ca 37 points 2 months ago
[–] Blue_Morpho@lemmy.world 77 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

They stopped fact checking just like Twitter didn't stop fact checking. It means they only stopped fact checking right wing news or popular posts that Zuckerberg doesn't like.

I assure you, if a Luigi post got popular, Facebook will "fact check" it before it gains traction.

[–] Sixtyforce@sh.itjust.works 18 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Just like any corporate status quo enforcer would yeah. Eh this is me probably preaching to the choir.

[–] SubArcticTundra@lemmy.ml 22 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)

Now that you mention it, it's interesting, considering how we all share the same views, how we use this platform to preach to ourselves rather than to organize and collaborate

[–] moncharleskey@lemmy.zip 6 points 2 months ago

Interesting and unfortunate.

[–] Sixtyforce@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 months ago

I've long said that it's possible venting anger on social media may be kinda like announcing you're gonna do something healthy and then not actually following through, because the brain's flawed reward system gives you the good feel chemicals for just fantasizing about going on that run instead of actually going for a run.

The next question I consider is if it wasn't a deliberate consequence in the early internet...are the billionaire corporates in charge of social media platforms aware of this now, thereby actively seeking out ways to make us docile more efficiently so we don't get "uppity?"

[–] sundrei@lemmy.sdf.org 62 points 2 months ago

Ol' Rat Cock is at it again, smh.

[–] henfredemars@infosec.pub 45 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I’m so glad that we have reliable news sources to inform us in these trying times.

[–] Frozengyro@lemmy.world 14 points 2 months ago

Do you think the onion has satire checkers, to make sure stuff is not reality?

I think the satire checkers dropped the ball on this one.

[–] cyrano@lemmy.dbzer0.com 38 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)

This gif looks like it’s from a mid-90s GeoCities page.

[–] UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml 4 points 2 months ago

Reject modernity, embrace You're The Man Now Dog.

[–] sumguyonline@lemmy.world 38 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Possibly THE funniest thing to see as the first thing populating the homepage when tripping shrooms. Good laugh.

[–] topherclay@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago

Kinda though anything you saw while tripping shrooms would be the funniest thing to see while tripping shrooms.

[–] imPastaSyndrome@lemm.ee 35 points 2 months ago

The UHC killer Mark Zuckerberg who framed Luigi?

[–] amlor@lemmy.world 24 points 2 months ago

Congrats for the upgrade!

[–] turtlepower@lemm.ee 23 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Don't insult rats like that, man.

[–] veroxii@aussie.zone 10 points 2 months ago

No one's insulting anyone. This is very generous from that rat and a huge upgrade for Zuck.

[–] RustyShackleford@literature.cafe 21 points 2 months ago (2 children)

I heard he eats prolapsed sphincters of diseased elderly animals.

[–] Entertainmeonly@lemmy.blahaj.zone 12 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 2 months ago

it'd be basically all sausages except hot dogs, since hot dogs are generally skinless afaik and hold together because they're like 30% flour.

[–] Zoomboingding@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago

No that's RFK

[–] expatriado@lemmy.world 19 points 2 months ago (1 children)

not fair, in the metaverse he has a big dong

[–] rockSlayer@lemmy.world 17 points 2 months ago

In fact, it exceeds the metaverse maximum by exactly 3 inches. I saw an internal meeting about it where he said "take that, Chad. Who's got a small dick now?"

[–] lemmydividebyzero@reddthat.com 14 points 2 months ago (1 children)

That's wrong. He wants the user base to check the facts.

Looks correct, if you ask me....

[–] frayedpickles@lemmy.cafe 6 points 2 months ago

Facts are of course by majority rule

[–] rowanthorpe@lemmy.ml 13 points 2 months ago

Yet, although this exhibits strong The Onion energy, strictly speaking this could be posted in Not The Onion. Names matter, and I would love to be a fly on the wall witnessing the momentary meltdowns when people read this there...

[–] noxypaws@pawb.social 11 points 2 months ago (1 children)

his stupid new hair only makes him look even more punchable, somehow

[–] Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works 5 points 2 months ago

Reports on meta state he's at least 10x more punchable.

[–] Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works 10 points 2 months ago

I can understand why he did this. This man has the smallest penis energy I've ever seen in my life.

[–] motor_spirit@lemmy.world 9 points 2 months ago (1 children)

is the seed of Dee Snider cosplaying as zuck? terrifying asf

[–] thefartographer@lemm.ee 10 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 2 months ago

No, he ain't gonna take it!

[–] Kyrgizion@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago

And it was still an upgrade.

[–] GenosseFlosse@feddit.org 6 points 2 months ago

Would be interesting to see the quality of his AI Project when it's trained on unmoderated Facebook posts.

[–] sad_detective_man@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

i was only really doing this for those woke's. you can come back antivaxers and q-anons, we're cool

[–] werefreeatlast@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago

So does it work? Can he fuck rats with it? Can he get rats pregnant?

I'm asking for a friend...squeak! Squeak!

[–] Fisherman75@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago

Shrodingers rat penis situation sounds like.

[–] kablammy@sh.itjust.works 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] ZeroCool@slrpnk.net 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I don’t click Facebook links.

[–] kablammy@sh.itjust.works 6 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Sorry, I would have linked their own website but the original page is now gone. Their headline in 2020 was '“Social media should not fact check posts” says child molester Mark Zuckerberg'. The post made more sense being on Facebook, though.