Programmer Humor

Meanwhile, Rust punches you in the face for the mere suggestion. Again. And again.

Python happily nods, runs it one page at a time, very slowly, randomly handing things off to a C person standing to the side, then returns a long poem. You wanted a number.

Assembly does no checking, and reality around you tears from an access violation.

EDIT: Oh, and the CUDA/PyTorch person is holding a vacuum sucking money from your wallet, with a long hose running to Jensen Huang's kitchen.

Am I bad at programming?

No, it’s the language thats wrong.

This is why I will never touch Javascript again. Long ago when I worked on web stuff, half my workflow was spent in the debugger tracing garbage to find where a typo was. The industry moved to Typescript, and now assuming the strictness checks are enabled, if some Typescript transpiles successfully, I can be 95% sure whatever fuckup I observe at runtime is a logic problem.

Weakly typed languages were an awful idea. But in general, if the compiler isn't able to detect most runtime issues (like with C++ here), it's not going to be the most productive language to use for building solutions compared to smarter alternatives.

Ah, C++. An endless supply of footguns where the difference between a junior and a senior dev is knowing what parts of the language to never use.

So? Do you really expect the compiler to UNDERSTAND the code?

Here is a grammatically correct phrase for you to think:

Compilers don't paint tangential apostrophes unless the storm value is deeper than radish. Fraggles love radish.

Typescript on the other hand: Exwuse me sir, you seem to have a little oopsie right here. Oh right! Let me just fix that right up.

HERE ARE TWO THOUSAND ERRORS! YOUR PUNY LITTLE BUFFER CAN'T EVEN SCROLL BACK TO READ THEM ALL! AND YOU CALL YOURSELF A PROGRAMMER?

Just me or is the single speech bubble loop in the 4th panel weird?

What surprised me the most was the speed of the compilation, must be a very small program. I tried to compile Godot from source once. Force-stopped it after 3 hours

Is C++ the first enemy that managed to win against one punch man?

I once wrote bind_front() and move_only_function likes in C++17. This nearly drove me mad because you cannot refer to a overload set by a name.

On the otherhand, I can now decipher the template error mess that the (g++) C++ compiler spews out.

I mean, the comic is fine I guess, but if it implies the Cpp lady is hitting you, it's not. That would be the kernel, the lady did what you told her to do.

Makes me think of:

• What people think programming is vs. how it actually is