Wait your turn sea dog. There are at least 5 different flavors of doritos we haven't discovered yet.
this post was submitted on 22 Mar 2025
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They could've stopped at Purple and my life would be fulfilled enough.
If you've ever read the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy then you'd already know these bastards are just gonna peace out when things get real. So long and thanks for all the fish they'll say as they abandon us to our untimely demise.
You don't see them fucking each other over for a goddamn percentage.
Sadly I can’t seem do find it anymore, but there used to be a fake org called the anti-dolphin coalition, claiming that dolphins were in control of all world governments and could kill you with brain lasers or something, among all kinds of other lunacy. It was a good chuckle back in the day.
So I’m sure how we conceive of being the dominant species is biased. But if we talk about civilizations and their ability to eventually propagate beyond earth, I don’t think dolphins have it. Their ancestry tried out land and said “nah, back to the water”. Not to mention anything we do that takes humans out of the equation entirely is going to probably kill off the dolphins, apes, elephants, basically most of the mammalians. It’ll be so long before something evolves to take our place as “earthlings” all our works will be fossils at best
Crows can use tools and won't need vehicles to travel. Dolphins don't stand a chance.
I for one welcome our new dolphin overlords
Dolphins are evil as fuck
Don't malign the whole species from some evildoers. ADAB - All Dolphins Aren't Bad
yeah, but, like, human level evil?
have we talked to them enough to know?
You're forgetting octopi, otters, squids, and maybe ants or other social insect.
Octopi are fundamentally against the concept of society. Squid are more open to it but are hard pressed to achieve anything since they die after mating.
Cuttlefish? And crabs!
Dogs have a shot, too
There is a sciemce fiction book on that, from Ray Bradbury.
So long, and thanks for all fish
It hits different when you realize it’s the humans that are leaving.
Nah it won't be dolphins, they don't have appendages that can do fine manipulations
Two words. Prehensile. Penis.
The dolphins and octopods will go to war over who inherits the earth
*octopodes (pronounced, I am reliably informed, like a Greek hero!)
My money's on squid. Super intelligent. Social. Fine dexterity.
Immune to acid ocean waters?
Honestly it’s not too difficult to do a better job than us
Nah dolphins would fuck it up too. I don't think they got this.
rape, rape everywhere
So, same as now. :/
Nah, they'll peace out as soon as the bulldozers show up
yep. they showed up at the latest landing, they want to hitch a ride off this place. so long and thanks for all the fish!
Looks like the dolphins are- AND THE SNAILS ARE GETTING IN THE RING WITH STEEL CHAIRS!?
Waits for the Great filter like a absolute boss
Oh yeah, well good luck doing shit without hands and feet!
I was told it would be monkey squids.